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Old 03.01.2016, 18:07
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Re: Written statement of borrowing/lending money?

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I agree with the shared sentiments on this thread. Interestingly enough, the supposed "friend" or family don't always adhere to a pre-agreed due date. On the other hand, loaning money to a relative stranger has yet to disappoint me.
O...K...

Nice of you to share...

I'm guessing by the two year time zone difference, you're back in Olten. In the future.
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Old 03.01.2016, 18:13
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Re: Written statement of borrowing/lending money?

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O...K...

Nice of you to share...

I'm guessing by the two year time zone difference, you're back in Olten. In the future.
Nope, just wanted to share my thoughts.
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  #23  
Old 03.01.2016, 21:30
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Re: Written statement of borrowing/lending money?

If the friend, relative, or stranger, cannot get a loan from a bank, wouldn't that indicate he or she is not a suitable person to be asking you for a loan?

It might seem hard, but it's best for both of you to refuse a loan, because you are only putting your friend/relative/acquaintance further into debt.
The borrowers must learn to live within their means.
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Old 04.01.2016, 08:48
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Re: Written statement of borrowing/lending money?

A little bit of Victorian wisdom: Never a lender or a borrower be.
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Old 04.01.2016, 16:34
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Re: Written statement of borrowing/lending money?

In one case, I did get back the money, but after like a year (instead of the promised 2 months)of constant asking and getting only lame excuses in return.

In the few other cases, my cash came back without even having to ask once. That's the way it should be.

In one case,it was a small amount , and I knew he was in trouble and I said payable when able. It hasn't come back and I'm totally ok with it. We're still very much in touch.
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Old 04.01.2016, 16:59
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Re: Written statement of borrowing/lending money?

Similar advice to everyone else...

Has this person exhausted all social help options and are you able to treat the money as 'gift/gone' - because the piece of paper you write that debt notice on will be worth very little.

Being 'indebted' to family and friends does very easily ruin relationships... both for the 'giver' and for the 'receiver'...
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Old 04.01.2016, 17:03
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Re: Written statement of borrowing/lending money?

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Being 'indebted' to family and friends does very easily ruin relationships... both for the 'giver' and for the 'receiver'...
I can definitely see the benefit to lending to some family members & not having to have anything to do with them afterwards.
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Old 04.01.2016, 17:04
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Re: Written statement of borrowing/lending money?

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A little bit of Victorian wisdom: Never a lender or a borrower be.
This sound advice predates even Victorian times. It comes from 1602 (Hamlet, Shakespeare)
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Old 04.01.2016, 17:58
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Re: Written statement of borrowing/lending money?

This thread got me thinking... over the years, I can remember having lent money several times to four different family members, also to two good friends, and having borrowed money once from a friend and once from an employer, once from someone whose client I was.

Three of these agreements were done with a handshake, but not before both persons had repeated, aloud, what he/she had understood the deal to be.

In all the other cases, the agreement was written down with names, dates, amounts, repayment schedules AND what would happen if the debtor defaulted. In some cases there were securities, e.g. a salary or some sort of property, in other cases not. Some of the loans had interest, others did not.

One debtor ran into new problems and after a few instalments decclared up front that the repayments would be late, and so we drew up a new schedule which was then adhered to. None of these debtors (including me) ever defaulted. All of the sums (including interest where applicable) were paid back in full.

So, yes, it definitely can work.
My mother's advice was
1. Never a lender nor a borrower be. Ever!

My father's advice was
1. Never lend money which you could not afford to forego, if the debtor absolutely did not repay.
2. Except in a matter of life or death - never borrow money such that you would even remotely potentially harm the lender's personal security if you ever defaulted against your Intention to repay.

My lawyer's advice was
1. Never lend money to someone you distrust in the first place (rather either say No, or if you feel inclined just give it to them in the first place and write it off).
2. Never lend money to anyone who is, in their person, a) basically lazy, dismissive, uncaring and disinterested, or b) aggressive, cheeky, argumentative and likely to get into - or to make - trouble.
3. Never lend money for a purpose with which you don't really agree. This includes resisting pressure by third persons who try to "make" you lend money to someone else they know.
4. Never hand over the money before the terms of the agreement are settled.
5. Never sign the agreement until each contracting person has read each sentence in the contract, aloud, to each other, and then used his/her own words to say what he/she understood by that sentence.

With these basic rules, I've ended up with some really heart-warming, cheering and very pragmatic solutions, in which people were genuinely helpe and enabled to take the next step up.
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