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Old 07.03.2012, 15:11
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Slammer in Antwerpen

For your widespread nefarious and heinous crimes against good taste, common sense, evolution and intelligence you are hereby sentenced to..

...two months of Belgium!
Methinks it is time to give y´all a little Slammerupdate
After the company that I worked for got it´s self sold I had the choice of either going on the Swiss dole or joining the inventory on the way out to Antwerpen, an easy decision, however I took my car and did not go with the stuff in the container.
Not gonna get too comfy here as this seems to be a two month limited gig and then I go on the Swiss dole.
So far it has been an interesting and vigorous 2012 for old Slammer, going back to 2011, I had been living in a little bed-sit in the center of Basel with the batty landlady who is missing a few Rappen to a full Frank, some of you may know the stories, but early last November at oh sodall in the morning I woke up to the sound of moaning, thinking that something had happened I chucked some clothes on and went to look, she was in the hall doing what appeared to be a belly dance in her nightie, only the nightie had a huge hole in the middle as if it had been hit by a shotgun.
She told me that the sprits had gone done ripped her clothes to shreds and that a spirit was in her and that she herself was now a ghost.
Slammer beat a hasty retreat, double locked the door and jammed a chair under the handle.
Clearly it was time to blow Dodge.

I found a flat in Kleinhüningen and just between christmas and new year moved in. Come first day at work in 2012, boss shaped man told us that the company had been sold, fuming, I moved back in to the madlandlady´s place the very next weekend.
So it´s February and I am in Antwerp on the Shelde River. I like Antwerp, as towns go it has the same "not-too-big-not-too-small" feel that I liked in Aarhus in Denmark and Basel in CH and as we know the north sea coast in spring is a nice place to be, but for now it is still mid winter and freezing.
The company found me a nice little studio in the center of town so Friday I struggled up the "stairs" (we would call belgium stairs ´ladders`) and dumped my stuff there.
Last night, tired of flicking through the TV channels I went out for the first time, the moment I hit the streets I pulled my collar up, it was pretty dull, dark and dismal.
Typical north sea weather.
Too wet for fog but not wet enough to call it´self rain, it doesn´t seem to fall to the ground from above to down as normal, rather it wafts around in soggy blobs staining the grey walls of the houses a darker shade of grey, mugging pedestrians. Definatly not officially approved Swiss rain.
Parts of Antwerp are still filled with ancient houses in the "fin de siècle" art-decor style, they are lovely to look at but now, in the dark and wet they seem very brooding and melancholic.
The studio is in the Jewish quarter and they have made their mark on this part of town, I have seldom seen so many old men with the dreadlocks, flowing white beards their black gowns and Hasidic hats.
I even managed a "Shalom" to a group as I walked past.
The old fashioned streetlamps cast a yellowish cone of light over the wet cobble-stones, I caught a glimpse of a woman running, the sound of her footsteps echoing as she clattered across the street.
I was in the middle of a set for a film noir.

I have decided not to drive the SlammerJeep into Antwerp but dump it on a park and ride and take the tram, drive around in downtown Antwerp for a while and you know that you are not in Kansas anymore, A Swiss driving style in Antwerp center will get you exactly nowhere pretty fast.
As usual when primed for Swiss driving I will slam on the irons as soon as somebody takes a glance at a pedestrian crossing, this causes the cars behind me to screech as they dare their brakes to eat themselves on the same note I am also gonna get myself killed as a pedestrian by dancing over said crossings without a care in the world.

The traffic lights are scary too, some with four lights, the bottom three do the red, yellow, green thingy but the top one stays red.
A traffic light telling you to stop and go at the same time, I get a paralytic freak on as my Swissified brain tries to divide by zero.
Must figure this out soon or the medics will have to drag me out of my car in a rictus and smoking.
Well this weekend I have decided to hit the coast and dip my feet in the sea.
Gonna have me some fun here, at least for two months.
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Old 07.03.2012, 15:20
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Re: Slammer in Antwerpen


Last edited by The_Love_Doctor; 07.03.2012 at 15:32.
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Old 07.03.2012, 18:32
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Re: Slammer in Antwerpen

Keep an eye about for diamonds.
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Old 07.03.2012, 18:44
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Re: Slammer in Antwerpen

Have a good time exploring Slammer, I'll look forward to more news.
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Old 13.03.2012, 14:05
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Re: Slammer in Antwerpen

Either Jew do or jew don't.
Living in a quarter mainly inhabited by Hasidic Jews and Moslems I find some of the interaction or lack of it quite amusing to watch.
There is a small park in the 'hood' with a playing area in the middle, a few restaurants, shops and a handfull of bars surround the square. Kids are as loud as you would expect, prams are pushed and people relax and enjoy themselves, people from all strata of society and all religions.
Moslems drink tea shoulder to shoulder with Baart Smit supping his 'Bolleke' (Antwerp typical beer) The only ones missing are the Jews, surprising as this area is right in the center of their quartier with Synagogues on almost every street corner, you see them up and down the steets to ane from their place of worship mouthing soundbites from the tora all wearing the black robes, dreadlocks and black or white tights, depending on the time of the day, and of course the strange looking furry hasidc hats that make them look like a chimmney sweeps brush.
A Swissified Slammer does the CHian thing and I am ashamed to admit to it but I find myself staring.
My fingers just itch to grab a hat and fling it.. Not because of anti sematic tendencies, I just want to see how far I can get it to fly.
They are totally integrated but are also totally apart, I mangaged a 'shalom' to a group and was regarded as something dropped from a dog that you step in.
Next time I gonna try a 'Salem Aleikum' just to see them burst into flames.
When there is interaction it seems to be mainly jews and moslems trying their best to annoy each other, two groups the other day all bow woof woof and in the middle, the DMZ, (my imagination runnin on overdrive here) a roman catholic child blarting his eyes out like a UN blue helmet soldier in the Gaza-strip.
Last friday against my own advise I drove into town and had to wait at a crossing, a bunch of Jews huddled so tight together as to be a solid mass. A scattering of Moselms, a group of men dressed as pirates, a large black woman carrying two 6 packs of water on her head in the african way, a group of Umpalumpas and a little black pot bellied pig.
Slammer has a cast iron sense of weird and I did not bat an eyelid, howeverI did think that a pig in a part of town inhabited mainly by Jews and moslems must be the happiest pig on earth.
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Old 13.03.2012, 14:18
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Re: Slammer in Antwerpen

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Slammer has a cast iron sense of weird and I did not bat an eyelid, howeverI did think that a pig in a part of town inhabited mainly by Jews and moslems must be the happiest pig on earth.


Awesome stories!!! Please keep them coming, and good luck in Antwerpen
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Old 13.03.2012, 14:26
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Re: Slammer in Antwerpen

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Last friday against my own advise I drove into town and had to wait at a crossing, a bunch of Jews huddled so tight together as to be a solid mass.

Slammer has a cast iron sense of weird and I did not bat an eyelid, howeverI did think that a pig in a part of town inhabited mainly by Jews and moslems must be the happiest pig on earth.
Ahwell that's where you went wrong. Belgians don't stop at crossings so anyone trying to go across does so at their own risk. They probably huddle together like a pack of animals to protect themselves only they put the weaker more expendable ones on the outside.

I visited Antwerp often and I must say that I must have missed this immensely interesting neighbourhood.

I did often see the jews on flights to Manchester though. You could guarantee that on every flight there would be at least half a dozen of them. Never quite figured out why.

A word of advice to you. If you value your life I would suggest you avoid driving into Brussels at all costs unless you're driving a tank.

At least the shops have sensible opening hours eh.
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Old 13.03.2012, 16:19
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Re: Slammer in Antwerpen

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Ahwell that's where you went wrong. Belgians don't stop at crossings so anyone trying to go across does so at their own risk. They probably huddle together like a pack of animals to protect themselves only they put the weaker more expendable ones on the outside.

I visited Antwerp often and I must say that I must have missed this immensely interesting neighbourhood.

I did often see the jews on flights to Manchester though. You could guarantee that on every flight there would be at least half a dozen of them. Never quite figured out why.

A word of advice to you. If you value your life I would suggest you avoid driving into Brussels at all costs unless you're driving a tank.

At least the shops have sensible opening hours eh.
The quarter is just back of the railwaystation, (magnificent as it is now with the the four decks, a masterpiece of engineering and archetecture) walk along the diamond shops for two bus stops and there you go.
As to driving, well Slammer drove a Gol (almost a VW Golf) for two years in Mexico city and survived, Bruessels is a doodle.
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Old 31.05.2012, 17:33
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Re: Slammer in Antwerpen

Slammer,
Are you sill in Antwerp or are you back in Basel?
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