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Old 28.08.2012, 22:27
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Fantasy punishments

So, inspired by this thread about someone's appalling bad manners and general arrogance, I mentioned that it would be good to have an area where you can vent your fantasy punishments for someone who has ticked you off.

Just before all the anti-violence people start popping a collective vein in outrage, this thread is FANTASY punishments which might (you never know!) diffuse someone's anger sufficiently to stop them actually going out and lamping that neighbour who is currently clonking around above them tonight...

I'll kick off with my punishment of handcuffing that Coop shelf stacker naked to the bike rack outside the post office, smearing him in Nutella and leaving the big licky dogs in the area to get busy with him.

His crime? Just being a miserable bugger day in day out and not helping the old lady next to him fathom out that the weighing scales were out of ticket roll.
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Old 28.08.2012, 22:31
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Re: Fantasy punishments

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handcuffing ...naked to the bike rack....smearing him in Nutella
Sounds more like your fantasy than his punishment
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Old 28.08.2012, 22:33
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Re: Fantasy punishments

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Sounds more like your fantasy than his punishment
It wouldn't be Nutella, though...
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Old 28.08.2012, 22:37
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Re: Fantasy punishments

Can we rename the thread to "secret BDSM fantasies"?
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Old 28.08.2012, 22:40
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Re: Fantasy punishments

For the people that always unwittingly stand a half-meter back from the shelves in the supermarket aisles, and thus block the entire aisle to anyone passing by...

I would feed you 3L of beer, and have an equally obnoxiously oblivious person stand between you and the bathroom door...
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Old 28.08.2012, 22:56
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Re: Fantasy punishments

I would just shoot all that annoy me. Imagination is not my strong point today
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Old 29.08.2012, 08:31
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For the people that always unwittingly stand a half-meter back from the shelves in the supermarket aisles, and thus block the entire aisle to anyone passing by...

I would feed you 3L of beer, and have an equally obnoxiously oblivious person stand between you and the bathroom door...
I believe this same punishment should apply to people who stand in front of the door as you try to get off a tram or metro with a big bag door suitcase or to the people who stand at the top of escalators in places like Manor or Globus.
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Old 29.08.2012, 09:01
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Re: Fantasy punishments

The sneaky punishment for bad parking, an anchovy fish dropped into the fresh air intake, just in front of the wipers... with a note under the wipers "Later, you are going to regret this piece of bad driving"

When my train arrives at a platform, and everyone tries to get on, I just sort of dive & collapse onto all of them. I used to play rugby, and I assure you they do get out of the way very quickly.

To the lady on the train, Saturday at Solothurn, reading the newspaper, pretending you didn't see me looking for an empty seat: I am NOT sorry I sat down on your legs! If you take up two seats without a seat reservation you must expect trouble.
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Old 29.08.2012, 09:08
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Re: Fantasy punishments

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When my train arrives at a platform, and everyone tries to get on, I just sort of dive & collapse onto all of them. I used to play rugby, and I assure you they do get out of the way very quickly.
Mustering up a lingering sulphurous, eggy fart on command would be a talent in any situation where everyone seems intent on standing all over you.
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Old 29.08.2012, 09:20
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Re: Fantasy punishments

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When my train arrives at a platform, and everyone tries to get on, I just sort of dive & collapse onto all of them. I used to play rugby, and I assure you they do get out of the way very quickly.
Chainsaw, la Evil Dead 2

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