Hi,

I have difficulties to switch off after work.
I check my e-mails all the time, I think about work related subjects and sometime even see them in my dreams (maybe better to say soft 'nightmares').

I do the planning for my job at home. Sometimes something about the work just pops up in my mind while I am having my dinner or watching a movie.

Sometimes I go out to meet some people to get distracted from work and have some drinks but there is something out there still running in the background. I can't really enjoy the private time I am having away from work because of this background process.

I am generally happy with my job. I think I have a good job.
When I observe and talk to my colleagues, I realized that they are easy about the job and they can easily move from work to private life after working hours. Work is just a tool for them to finance their life. I suspect this is the case for me and work means more for me :-(

Did any of you have similar problems? How did you overcome this problem?

Thanks

Start practicing meditation.

..... and only 20 posts on EF in two years - the rest of us don't even have time to worry about work.

Yep, I wasted too much of my life thinking otherwise.

I tend to get in early as I'm an early riser, and do plan my day and get important emails out of the way on my commute, but come 5 in the afternoon, unless there is something critical, that's it. Work phone off, iPod on, and I wont even think about work until I wake up the next day. Occaisionally I'll deal with something important on my commute back, but as soon as my train reaches my stop anything left over will be dealt with the next day.

Things I would suggest:

Your work phone and laptop have off buttons - use them.

Try going for a couple of beers or whatever at the end of the day to wind down. You'll meet other people who do the same thing and you can talk about any old crap which will help take your mind off work. EDIT - I've just checked your profile and location and I reckon the International Beer Bar would be ideal for you as there are a number of English speakers there and a very wide selection of beers

Take up a hobby or find something that interests you. This will make you concentrate on that rather than work.

Pick a time, say 5 or 6 at the end of the day, and treat it as a cut off point. Anything not done by then will be picked up again the next day. Having this cut off point I find makes me focus, work more efficiently, and get more done as I want my free time.

The fact that you're posting this would suggest to me that you're probably feeling quite stressed about your work situation. If so then you need to take steps to reduce that stress otherwise it may lead to a burn out situation - I've seen it happen.

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...allegedly.

Thanks Slaphead. The International is only 10 minutes walk from my office.
Good selection of beers

The real problem is not having to work too much because of the load. I work because I think I should, I am not forced to do so.
It is more about that background process which is about planning the future moves, changes, improvements. That kills the joy of moment when you are having that first sip of your Abbey or a dram of Laphroaig.

Maybe I should look into meditation as IzabelaInZug suggested. That is something I didn't think about before.

My sisters have both been using a method called "Headspace", which they say really helps with stress and anxiety.

https://www.headspace.com

Just a thought, if you enjoy thinking about work, and if it gives you pleasure to do so, then it shouldn't be a problem, and there is no need to try hard to restrain it. People have different hobbies and for some, their work is a hobby.
You should only think of it as a problem if it bothers you (like feeling stressed, not having time for other important things), or your social life and the people you socially interact with. Maybe find and develop a hobby that you can become very passionate about?

try to go to a yoga or meditation class directly after work. it makes for a good transition between work and non-work life and it can make it much easier to 'turn off' the work part of your life for the rest of your evening...

Cycle / Walk to work. Repeat home.

May I suggest planning other things to look forward to during your week? The more you do, the less energy you'll devote to your dominating issue.

Balance. When your mind is clear, your thinking becomes more efficient.

Try Qi Qong / Tai Chi Chuan. There are weekly classes in English and German here. Tai Chi Chuan - also called Taijiquan or Tai Chi - is an 800 year old, holistic Martial Art from China. It combines physical movement, relaxation, mental training, self defence and meditation.

Tai Chi Chuan strengthens health and vitality whilst developing the skill to be and remain relaxed and focused. It develops a high level of mental strength and clarity.

"Don't worry; don't intellectualise and enjoy your practice" - Grandmaster Wong Kiew Kit

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I make a list at the end of every day of the things that I know will need to be done the following morning, and then I shut down and head home. I still check the handy every now and then through the evening to ensure no emergencies, but otherwise I find other things to focus on, e.g. I run for 45 minutes, play sports, play music, whatever. I suppose for me the fact that there are 3 kids and a dog running around my house vying for my attention helps keep me distracted from work.

get a girlfriend or boyfriend.

Why singular? The man needs strong medicine.

spouse

I don't get it. Am I the only one who has a nice spouse with no stress?
Strong medecine = life Strauss-Kahn style.

There are lots of solutions for how to detach from work, but it will be hard to find the right one unless you know better why you're so 'attached' to work - why do you think you 'should' be working all the time? Does it come from within you - you're worried you're going to forget something, you're worried you're not doing enough, maybe you're worried about other things and focusing on work instead?

Or does the pressure seem to come from outside? Does your boss put pressure on you? Do your colleagues seem to be working all the time so you feel like you should too? Until it's clear what's driving the need to be 'on' all the time, you won't really be able to shut off fully, to do the other things that I'm sure you have going on, or would like to be doing.

There's a lot written out there on it, here's a short article that might be a good start: https://hbr.org/2011/01/detach-yourself-from-your-work

Good luck! Recognizing things could be better is a great first step

Thanks your answers.
I guess I have to find a hobby that i will attach with passion or a girlfriend who will keep me busy.

I must say that I got much better at switching off since I started to commute to work on my motorcycle!!

beer, then some more beer

followed by a beer

I have the opposite issue: How do I switch ON for work?!?

the answer to both questions is this:

Sex and Drugs and Rock 'n' Roll!