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Old 12.11.2009, 07:47
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Germany's soccer player Enke Commits Suicide ( Depression )

Depression is such a terrible illness for someone to have to endure alone. It seems that most people try to hide this condition from the people around them because of the fear of being considered weak...

I would imagine that being part of a team sport, your fellow teammates would notice that you are not your normal self. But in Enke's case, his teammates didn't know that he was suffering from such deep depression. Maybe, if the team was allowed, by Enke, to be there for him, this terrible tragedy could have, possibly, been avoided.

I would like to just remind everyone to take time out from their busy lives to check on their fellow friends and family. And especially now that the holidays are coming upon us. People seem to suffer even more during this time of year from being lonely.......

Have a great day all here on EF!
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Old 12.11.2009, 16:09
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Re: Germany's soccer player Enke Commits Suicide

this has been all over the news. terrible, also as his daughter died in 2006?
you are right about christmas time being an especially lonely time for some - and yes a higher suicide rate during these holidays seasons.
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Old 12.11.2009, 16:25
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Re: Germany's soccer player Enke Commits Suicide

I thought busy sportsmen, don't have time to get depressed!
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Old 12.11.2009, 16:52
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Re: Germany's soccer player Enke Commits Suicide

Depression has no boundaries. You can be rich, poor, tall, short, blk, wht etc.... and still become depressed. And most of the time it's not even noticed until there is a cry for help, or it's too late....

I never thought much of it until someone I know had a nervous breakdown from depression. The majority of people do become depressed at some point in their life, but have the ability to work through it and continue on.. And then there are some, whom are becoming an increasingly growing number, that can't shake it and begin spiraling downward into a, seemingly, hopeless situation.

And being a friend to such a person can be very demanding and energy draining.
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Old 12.11.2009, 17:48
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Re: Germany's soccer player Enke Commits Suicide

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Depression has no boundaries. You can be rich, poor, tall, short, blk, wht etc.... and still become depressed. And most of the time it's not even noticed until there is a cry for help, or it's too late....

I never thought much of it until someone I know had a nervous breakdown from depression. The majority of people do become depressed at some point in their life, but have the ability to work through it and continue on.. And then there are some, whom are becoming an increasingly growing number, that can't shake it and begin spiraling downward into a, seemingly, hopeless situation.

And being a friend to such a person can be very demanding and energy draining.
I have to agree with you and thanks you for that post. I'm myself in that way and lost several friends 'coz of that. I've thought sometimes that you can't understand how deep depression can bring you if you haven't been this way before. And mine is quite different. I'm an anxious depressive guy.

I can't tell that I understand how deep he went in his depression before he took his life because there's nothing you can compare but I've been really deep too.

Praying for him.
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Old 12.11.2009, 17:55
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Re: Germany's soccer player Enke Commits Suicide

Poor man. It's terrible throwing himself in front of a train. So awful for his loved ones.

All I can add is what an acquaintance, who is a psychiatrist, once said: "Don't suffer alone. Depression is often caused by an imbalance in the chemicals of one's brain, which can be corrected with the right drugs. Don't be ashamed to seek professional help."
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Old 12.11.2009, 18:14
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Re: Germany's soccer player Enke Commits Suicide

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Depression has no boundaries. You can be rich, poor, tall, short, blk, wht etc.... and still become depressed. And most of the time it's not even noticed until there is a cry for help, or it's too late....

I never thought much of it until someone I know had a nervous breakdown from depression. The majority of people do become depressed at some point in their life, but have the ability to work through it and continue on.. And then there are some, whom are becoming an increasingly growing number, that can't shake it and begin spiraling downward into a, seemingly, hopeless situation.

And being a friend to such a person can be very demanding and energy draining.
i couldn't have put it any better.
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Old 12.11.2009, 18:18
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Re: Germany's soccer player Enke Commits Suicide

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I have to agree with you and thanks you for that post. I'm myself in that way and lost several friends 'coz of that. I've thought sometimes that you can't understand how deep depression can bring you if you haven't been this way before. And mine is quite different. I'm an anxious depressive guy.

I can't tell that I understand how deep he went in his depression before he took his life because there's nothing you can compare but I've been really deep too.

Praying for him.
I can't say that I know what it feels like to be in such a state-of mind.

I was always the one to think that you just pick yourself up and keep going. Not until I was personally connected to someone that was clinically depressed did I begin to understand that the type of depression they had was different than the milder form I experienced.
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Old 12.11.2009, 18:25
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Re: Germany's soccer player Enke Commits Suicide

And even drugs don't always help you. This kind of depression is so strong that any kind of events can bring you down suddenly, it's emotionally and physically tiring....

And when you're depressed, you act stupidly... (I've broken what could have been a beautiful friendship)
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Old 12.11.2009, 18:45
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Re: Germany's soccer player Enke Commits Suicide

Maybe you should open up to this person and let them know what you are going through.

A true friendship will survive the good and bad times. But you have to have communication for any type of relationship to work.
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Old 12.11.2009, 20:14
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Re: Germany's soccer player Enke Commits Suicide

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Maybe you should open up to this person and let them know what you are going through.

A true friendship will survive the good and bad times. But you have to have communication for any type of relationship to work.
Thanks for the advise. But that's too late.
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Old 12.11.2009, 22:06
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Re: Germany's soccer player Enke Commits Suicide

I believe he died of grief.

Depression is when you have mental instability due to psychological issues
Grief is being overwhelmed with a situation regarding the loss of a loved one.

We are human, we are made of flesh and blood and we break.

May God have mercy and bless him.
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Old 12.11.2009, 22:35
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Re: Germany's soccer player Enke Commits Suicide

Been on a steep slope myself once and found much comfort in this one.

Please spend a few minutes and absorb the lyrics...............

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Old 12.11.2009, 22:46
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Re: Germany's soccer player Enke Commits Suicide

Unfortunately, when the Black Dog really kicks in, no music is any comfort. Nor are the kind words of friends, an appreciation of what one has in life, a walk in the mountains, a pint of good ale, or anything else that would normally lift one's spirits. All one feels is a deep sense of emptiness, worthlessness, pointlessness. And, all too often, one can only see one way out of the pain.

Imagine standing with your face against a wall. To the left of you, perhaps no more than twelve inches away, there is an open door. Behind you, all your friends and family are shouting at the top of their voices, trying to tell you that the door is there. But you can't hear them: You can't hear anything, you can't see anything except the wall, right there, in front of you, in your face.

That's what depression is like.

Of course, when we're up, and everything is ticking along nicely, we know that life is a wheel, and that when we're down we're certain to come up again.

When we're down, we can't see that, can't comprehend that, no matter how many people tell us it is so, no matter how many songs remind us that we're all in the same boat.

I'd never judge a person who took the only way out of the pain that he could see, even if everyone around him saw other options. Depression makes one blind.

I'll be praying for this man's family tonight.
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Old 13.11.2009, 00:35
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Re: Germany's soccer player Enke Commits Suicide

Thanks DB... from what I've heard, that is exactly what it's like, and it's horrible...

Here in Germany, *everybody* is talking about this. As I don't really follow football, all I can remember is reading about the puzzling and mysterious illness (was called a "bacterial infection" at the time) keeping Enke from playing with the German national team over the last months. I spoke with a friend about this yesterday, and we came to the conclusion that he really was in a terrible lose/lose situation. Had he come clean about it, the pressure on him would have been enormous... imagine if, in that situation, he had still been playing. Any mistakes would have been chalked up to that, I am sure he would have been heckled about it... awful. Apparently he refused to go for in-patient treatment, I am assuming because he feared the diagnosis getting out.

All the - in my eyes to some part false - sympathy now cannot change the fact that there is no good solution. I think Deisler (sorry, don't know his first name off-hand) did the right thing when he just quit the sport at the time and dropped completely out of the public sphere, in a similar situation. He has been in the media a bit recently, as he has written a book, openly talking about the difficulties he went through.
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Old 13.11.2009, 02:24
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Re: Germany's soccer player Enke Commits Suicide

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I believe he died of grief.

Depression is when you have mental instability due to psychological issues
Grief is being overwhelmed with a situation regarding the loss of a loved one.
So you're saying that the loss of a loved one is somehow separated from mental instability? The loss of a loved one seems like a trauma to me; one which could develop into a major depression over time.

Thanks DB for your beautiful words. It was very very nice to read that.

For those who suggest that if only Enke had been more open to his teammates, he would have felt their love shining at him, I counter that you've never spent much time in a professional team world. Yes, the bond between members is incredibly strong, but they are all still part of a team. One off day, maybe a few off days, will be tolerated "with love," but depression doesn't last for just a few days - and well, the Doors put it best saying, "Nobody knows you when you're down and out."
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Old 13.11.2009, 07:46
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Re: Germany's soccer player Enke Commits Suicide

Quote:
Unfortunately, when the Black Dog really kicks in, no music is any comfort. Nor are the kind words of friends, an appreciation of what one has in life, a walk in the mountains, a pint of good ale, or anything else that would normally lift one's spirits. All one feels is a deep sense of emptiness, worthlessness, pointlessness. And, all too often, one can only see one way out of the pain.

Imagine standing with your face against a wall. To the left of you, perhaps no more than twelve inches away, there is an open door. Behind you, all your friends and family are shouting at the top of their voices, trying to tell you that the door is there. But you can't hear them: You can't hear anything, you can't see anything except the wall, right there, in front of you, in your face.

That's what depression is like.

Of course, when we're up, and everything is ticking along nicely, we know that life is a wheel, and that when we're down we're certain to come up again.

When we're down, we can't see that, can't comprehend that, no matter how many people tell us it is so, no matter how many songs remind us that we're all in the same boat.

I'd never judge a person who took the only way out of the pain that he could see, even if everyone around him saw other options. Depression makes one blind.

I'll be praying for this man's family tonight.
Great post DB.....It really helps us who don't fully understand the severity of this illness, just how difficult it can be to deal with.
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Old 13.11.2009, 08:06
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Re: Germany's soccer player Enke Commits Suicide

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So you're saying that the loss of a loved one is somehow separated from mental instability? The loss of a loved one seems like a trauma to me; one which could develop into a major depression over time.

Thanks DB for your beautiful words. It was very very nice to read that.

For those who suggest that if only Enke had been more open to his teammates, he would have felt their love shining at him, I counter that you've never spent much time in a professional team world. Yes, the bond between members is incredibly strong, but they are all still part of a team. One off day, maybe a few off days, will be tolerated "with love," but depression doesn't last for just a few days - and well, the Doors put it best saying, "Nobody knows you when you're down and out."
This post wasn't started to judge who's experience with depression, whether personal or through a friend, is right or wrong. I think everyone who has insight/experience with depression can offer valuable information. So, let's just let people post their own experiences without judgement........

Depression comes in many forms and degrees of severity. Some people who are depressed might just need a friend to lean on, or just for someone to talk to. And then there are people who are in such a mental darkness to where they can't see the light anymore as DB wrote in his post.
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