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28.02.2011, 17:50
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| | Re: Why is it so hard to find a date in Zurich?! (hope my friends wont kill me) | Quote: | |  | | | And a viable alternative for the advancement of mankind would be? ... | | | | | extinction?
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28.02.2011, 17:50
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| | Re: Why is it so hard to find a date in Zurich?! (hope my friends wont kill me) | Quote: | |  | | | You could be right but call me old fashioned, as I would still say it has more to do with Men taking responsibility or maybe I know too little. | | | | |
There's a recent article in the WSJ from a feminist, Where Have The Good Men Gone?, in which she complains that young men don't want to grow up. She wants them to "man up".
(My immediate reaction was "since when do the fish care what the bicycles do?")
I have a lot of sympathy for these young men. What's the value to them of becoming the "nice guy provider"? Since the female sexual liberation, it's just as easy for them to get regular sex without having to be in a marriage or even much of a relationship.
The women, on the other hand, spend their peak years shagging as many bad-boy, alpha types as they can. Then, when they're hitting thirty and their value is dropping, they seem to expect men to step up and provide for them so they can stop work and have the children they want.
Then a few years later, these men have their home and everything they've worked for ripped away from them in a vindictive divorce.
The young men see that as what happens when they get "sensible and responsible", so really, why should they?
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28.02.2011, 17:54
| | Re: Why is it so hard to find a date in Zurich?! (hope my friends wont kill me)
Hahahaha, I didnt belive you'd do that!!! | 
28.02.2011, 17:55
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| | Re: Why is it so hard to find a date in Zurich?! (hope my friends wont kill me) | Quote: | |  | | | Decent, nice guys with unrealistic tick boxes or have set their sights too high, which is stopping them from having a relationship, does not sound much decent or sensible to me. | | | | | Being a decent, nice guy and setting one's sights too high can be mutually exclusive. In other words, there are nice blokes out there who do not do this and there are, of course, those who do... Besides, my post refers to the high expectations of "both sides" which includes women too. | 
28.02.2011, 17:56
| | Re: Why is it so hard to find a date in Zurich?! (hope my friends wont kill me)
Lux Interior - your avatar goes so well with your comment. | 
28.02.2011, 17:59
| Banned | | Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: Graubünden
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| | Re: Why is it so hard to find a date in Zurich?! (hope my friends wont kill me) | Quote: | |  | | | There's a recent article in the WSJ from a feminist, Where Have The Good Men Gone?, in which she complains that young men don't want to grow up. She wants them to "man up".
(My immediate reaction was "since when do the fish care what the bicycles do?")
I have a lot of sympathy for these young men. What's the value to them of becoming the "nice guy provider"? Since the female sexual liberation, it's just as easy for them to get regular sex without having to be in a marriage or even much of a relationship.
The women, on the other hand, spend their peak years shagging as many bad-boy, alpha types as they can. Then, when they're hitting thirty and their value is dropping, they seem to expect men to step up and provide for them so they can stop work and have the children they want.
Then a few years later, these men have their home and everything they've worked for ripped away from them in a vindictive divorce.
The young men see that as what happens when they get "sensible and responsible", so really, why should they? | | | | | Very true what you've said, I will agree with that.
Re: divorce and rip off, I have known girls who were not really driven by greed or money (as far as I knew). But then again I would avoid such girls if I get that vibe.
Another point you need to consider is, women get vindictive and want to rip you off when they hold some kind of grudge and want to hurt you.
And also they usually leave the guy when they think it will hurt him. If the girl knows that as soon as she leaves her partner, there is a much better woman just waiting to snap him, she would never leave him but rather stick with him and maybe try to make his life miserable  | Quote: | |  | | | Being a decent, nice guy and setting one's sights too high can be mutually exclusive. In other words, there are nice blokes out there who do not do this and there are, of course, those who do... Besides, my post refers to the high expectations of "both parties" which includes women too.  | | | | | Having high expectations basically means the person is not in touch with the reality which means he/she is not in touch with his brain cells
But then again, like I said, women's decisions and expectations can always be influenced | 
28.02.2011, 18:04
|  | Forum Veteran | | Join Date: Aug 2010 Location: UK (formerly Zurich)
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| | Re: Why is it so hard to find a date in Zurich?! (hope my friends wont kill me) | Quote: | |  | | | Hahahaha, I didnt belive you'd do that!!!  | | | | | Haha! Thought you were way past it anyway?! | 
28.02.2011, 18:04
| | Re: Why is it so hard to find a date in Zurich?! (hope my friends wont kill me) | Quote: | |  | | | The women, on the other hand, spend their peak years shagging as many bad-boy, alpha types as they can. Then, when they're hitting thirty and their value is dropping, they seem to expect men to step up and provide for them so they can stop work and have the children they want. | | | | | Oh, that is such a sad sight to see. I've seen many exceptionally beautiful women go psycho after certain years.
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28.02.2011, 18:09
| | Re: Why is it so hard to find a date in Zurich?! (hope my friends wont kill me)
yep, will agree about that - most of course driven crazy by being married to the wrong man!  | 
28.02.2011, 18:12
|  | Forum Veteran | | Join Date: Aug 2010 Location: UK (formerly Zurich)
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| | Re: Why is it so hard to find a date in Zurich?! (hope my friends wont kill me) | Quote: | |  | | | Having high expectations basically means the person is not in touch with the reality which means he/she is not in touch with his brain cells  | | | | | Let's just agree to disagree on that. | Quote: | |  | | | But then again, like I said, women's decisions and expectations can always be influenced  | | | | | True in some cases, but not all. Same with men.
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28.02.2011, 18:15
|  | Forum Legend | | Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Zurich
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| | Re: Why is it so hard to find a date in Zurich?! (hope my friends wont kill me) | Quote: | |  | | | ..........The women, on the other hand, spend their peak years shagging as many bad-boy, alpha types as they can. Then, when they're hitting thirty and their value is dropping, they seem to expect men to step up and provide for them so they can stop work and have the children they want........ | | | | | yeah that biological clock can be a bitch!
Luckily I age very slowly and look a lot younger than I am (well I hope it's lucky). I got carded at a party where you had to be 14 to get in  !
Guess it's about time to start trying this 'dating' thing everyone keeps on going on about. Don't have to worry about biological clocks.
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28.02.2011, 18:32
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| | Re: Why is it so hard to find a date in Zurich?! (hope my friends wont kill me) | Quote: | |  | | | ...Luckily I age very slowly and look a lot younger than I am (well I hope it's lucky). I got carded at a party where you had to be 14 to get in ! | | | | | Gee, it must've been tough going being called Grandpa at this party! | Quote: | |  | | | ...Guess it's about time to start trying this 'dating' thing everyone keeps on going on about. ... | | | | | Get on out there and have fun! Just don't get "Wasted". Well not too much anyway. | 
28.02.2011, 18:56
|  | Forum Legend | | Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Zurich
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| | Re: Why is it so hard to find a date in Zurich?! (hope my friends wont kill me) | Quote: | |  | | | Gee, it must've been tough going being called Grandpa at this party! 
Get on out there and have fun! Just don't get "Wasted". Well not too much anyway.  | | | | |
luckily only two people actually knew my age---other than that, I fit right in | 
28.02.2011, 18:56
| Forum Legend | | Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: At home
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| | Re: Why is it so hard to find a date in Zurich?! (hope my friends wont kill me) | Quote: | |  | | | There's a recent article in the WSJ from a feminist, Where Have The Good Men Gone?, in which she complains that young men don't want to grow up. She wants them to "man up". | | | | | WARNING: Read the message til the end, please. I am neither mysogyn nor contradicting. Those who understand be thanked.
She is entitled to her opinion, but so am I: she missed a major point in the matter. Young men (20-35) take woman liberation far more seriously than women themselves and act accordingly as they just don't secure them a life. Women ought to be as independent as they want to, and this is exactly what young men are giving them. In other words: be careful what you wish for, you may have to live up to it.
By nature, having a familly means making yourself dependent of others and be happy with it (for the sake of love and the future of humality). So with younger men expecting women to be independent, the familly role play does not match anymore. Women play on both sides and try to make society understand that a working mum needs services in order to continue being a working mum as opposed to ex-working mum. Men looking at that do not understand anymore why women suddenly do not want to be independent anymore and make themselves dependent upon services and laws from the community. The unfair part of the deal for women is that there is no belly-share like one can have house-shores-share. And here you have it: women would have to be independent and dependent at the same time. And that does not make sense to them either.
Morality: Sex is better since sexual revolution, just having babies is worse.
__________________ Es wird nichts ausgelassen, um mich hier herauszuekeln. Ein Lehrbuch. False accusations and attacks continue. There is no stopping righteous people when they are wrong.
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28.02.2011, 19:03
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| | Re: Why is it so hard to find a date in Zurich?! (hope my friends wont kill me) | Quote: | |  | | | luckily only two people actually knew my age---other than that, I fit right in  | | | | | Haha! I just had a like "doh" moment when I re-read your post and realized you had to be a minimum age of 14 to get in and not 14 itself!
I missed my afternoon nap and so should be excused for that. | 
28.02.2011, 19:08
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| | Re: Why is it so hard to find a date in Zurich?! (hope my friends wont kill me)
The writer of the article, Kay Hymowitz, has a book "Manning Up: How the Rise of Women Has Turned Men into Boys".
Here's a great comment on Amazon.
I'd suggest that the sexual revolution has only benefited some men.
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28.02.2011, 19:21
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| | Re: Why is it so hard to find a date in Zurich?! (hope my friends wont kill me) | Quote: | |  | | | An ex-BF could do with reading this. Very intelligent, ambitious and driven man with a great sense of humour and other really nice qualities. All good. But, would never admit when wrong or that I was more knowledgeable on some things than him. Not a chance. Result = BIG FAIL. | | | | | but what if he is, like me, never wrong and know better on everything?
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28.02.2011, 19:42
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| | Re: Why is it so hard to find a date in Zurich?! (hope my friends wont kill me) | Quote: | |  | | | but what if he is, like me, never wrong and know better on everything? | | | | | = No hope. | 
28.02.2011, 19:52
| | Re: Why is it so hard to find a date in Zurich?! (hope my friends wont kill me) | Quote: | |  | | | = No hope.  | | | | | Well, you know how people want things they can't have. Sometimes dumping someone is just what they need to realize what they did have. If he calls and says he wants you back, then, maybe then, you have him in the palm of your hands.  You could set the terms at that point. Never sell yourself short. | 
28.02.2011, 20:41
|  | Forum Veteran | | Join Date: Aug 2010 Location: UK (formerly Zurich)
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| | Re: Why is it so hard to find a date in Zurich?! (hope my friends wont kill me) | Quote: | |  | | | Well, you know how people want things they can't have. Sometimes dumping someone is just what they need to realize what they did have. If he calls and says he wants you back, then, maybe then, you have him in the palm of your hands. You could set the terms at that point. Never sell yourself short.  | | | | | Great advice and which may work for someone else but I know him too well. He won't call and is likely waiting for me to do it besides which I don't want him back anyway. It's done. It's okay. It's good. Life goes on... |
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