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  #101  
Old 21.12.2010, 16:29
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Re: Can my housemate forbid a friend from visiting me?

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Hmm, I wouldn't want any of my exes in my home, ESPECIALLY if I wasn't at home.
How many exes do you have then??
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  #102  
Old 21.12.2010, 17:01
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Re: Can my housemate forbid a friend from visiting me?

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Both the e-mail and the follow up SMS have been safely filed away for future reference should they be needed and they will most definitely not be replied to.
faking an email or an sms is child's play ... you know that, right?

which is why most jurisdictions will not accept either as legal evidence.
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  #103  
Old 21.12.2010, 17:24
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Re: Can my housemate forbid a friend from visiting me?

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I am about 500% certain that this is not the situation.
I'm a 1000% that one of them is a bunny boiler. Or is it that the main tenant is a animal rightsist?
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  #104  
Old 21.12.2010, 18:23
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Re: Can my housemate forbid a friend from visiting me?

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How many exes do you have then??
I have commitment issues. Especially with men who really should be a different kind of committed...

You were introduced while they were still together, right? There seems to be the tacit understanding that you pick a side and then stick to it...
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  #105  
Old 21.12.2010, 19:14
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Re: Can my housemate forbid a friend from visiting me?

So what is the moral of this story?
Or is the full story not evident yet...which is what I suspect
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  #106  
Old 21.12.2010, 19:29
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Re: Can my housemate forbid a friend from visiting me?

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I have commitment issues. Especially with men who really should be a different kind of committed...

You were introduced while they were still together, right? There seems to be the tacit understanding that you pick a side and then stick to it...
No, I was introduced to my housemate in June of this year as she was looking for someone to rent a room from her and I needed somewhere to live. We got along okay and she said if you want the room you can move in whenever you like. The next time I met her was 2 weeks later when I moved in with all my boxes.
They had and still have been split for 8 years and living in different homes for 3 years.
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  #107  
Old 21.12.2010, 19:34
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Re: Can my housemate forbid a friend from visiting me?

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So here is the situation.... Sorry, but it’s quite a long one...
In July I moved into a shared apartment with a friend of a friend. My friend had lived there in the past, but has lived elsewhere for 3 years.The person who already lived here is the main tenant and I am the untermieter. It is all above board, I pay my rent to her on time and I have signed the necessary paperwork with the city. I should probably point out here, that they were partners, but seperated amicably.
In October my housemate sent an e-mail to my friend ( the one who introduced us) stating that she was no longer allowed to visit the property and if she did so she could be prosecuted for trespassing under Article 186. The e-mail was prompted by the fact that my friend happened to stay over for one night a few nights before... She did absolutely nothing wrong, i was present and she did not enter my housemates private rooms.
This is the extract from the e-mail:
Art. 186
Hausfriedensbruch
Wer gegen den Willen des Berechtigten in ein Haus, in eine Wohnung, in einen abgeschlossenen Raum eines Hauses oder in einen unmittelbar zu einem Hause gehörenden umfriedeten Platz, Hof oder Garten oder in einen Werkplatz unrechtmässig eindringt oder, trotz der Aufforderung eines Berechtigten, sich zu entfernen, darin verweilt, wird, auf Antrag, mit Freiheitsstrafe bis zu drei Jahren oder Geldstrafe bestraft.
Since the e-mail was issued my friend has not stayed the night but has visited on a handful of occasions and I have always been present.
Today, my friend received another e-mail from my housemate, attaching a letter and it reads as follows:


Generelles Hausverbot

Am 4. Oktober habe ich dir per e-mail geschrieben, dass du nichts mehr in meiner Wohnung zu suchen hast.
Dein Verhalten ist schlecht und verletzend. Du bist eine Frau geworden, die weder Ehre, Ethik noch Moral kennt.
Ich erlasse an dich, (my friends name), Zürich, folgendes

generelles Hausverbot

Dieses Hausverbot erstreckt sich auf alle meine Räumlichkeiten an der (my address), die Wohnung in der 2. Etage, Kellerabteil und Estrichabteil.Es ist dir, (my friends name), unter Androhung von Straf- und Kostenfolgen im Zuwiderhandlungsfalle untersagt, die oben erwähnten Räumlichkeiten zu betreten oder durch beigezogene Dritte betreten zu lassen.


The questions are; Is she allowed to forbid any of my friends from visiting when I am at the property? Is the letter, or indeed the original e-mail legally binding?
Any pointers on this would be helpful. Thanks in advance.
$hit I miss Switzerland , so many rules to brake
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  #108  
Old 21.12.2010, 19:40
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Re: Can my housemate forbid a friend from visiting me?

OK, 8 years is a long time, but it does also depend on why they split (although if they were still flat makes for 5 years makes you wonder...) For instance my OH and I have just separated after 15 years of marriage because of his affair - he now insists on taking his OW to our holiday flat that we (OH & I) own. The place is my dream, my territory, he even admits it was always my dream not his and says it was only ever an investment to him (funny, seemed like the fulfilment of a dream for him too when we bought the place) and it makes me see absolute red that a) he hasn't the slightest consideration for me and insists on rubbing my face in the situation by taking her there in the face of my opposition and b) I'm not sure legally there is anything I can do about it. If anyone has any bright ideas whether there's anything I can do other than telling him she's persona non grata and relying on his non-existent sense of honour I would be grateful!...but I digress. My point is, if you know they are exes, then the situation always has the potential to be fraught and I feel (with admitted bias) that it would be considerate of you, not to mention defuse the situation while you look for somewhere else to live, to meet your friend anywhere else but in the flat. There must be plenty of places, so why is it so very important to you to stand on your rights on this now you've decided to move? What would a bit of consideration cost you?
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  #109  
Old 21.12.2010, 20:02
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Re: Can my housemate forbid a friend from visiting me?

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OK, 8 years is a long time, but it does also depend on why they split (although if they were still flat makes for 5 years makes you wonder...) For instance my OH and I have just separated after 15 years of marriage because of his affair - he now insists on taking his OW to our holiday flat that we (OH & I) own. The place is my dream, my territory, he even admits it was always my dream not his and says it was only ever an investment to him (funny, seemed like the fulfilment of a dream for him too when we bought the place) and it makes me see absolute red that a) he hasn't the slightest consideration for me and insists on rubbing my face in the situation by taking her there in the face of my opposition and b) I'm not sure legally there is anything I can do about it. If anyone has any bright ideas whether there's anything I can do other than telling him she's persona non grata and relying on his non-existent sense of honour I would be grateful!...but I digress. My point is, if you know they are exes, then the situation always has the potential to be fraught and I feel (with admitted bias) that it would be considerate of you, not to mention defuse the situation while you look for somewhere else to live, to meet your friend anywhere else but in the flat. There must be plenty of places, so why is it so very important to you to stand on your rights on this now you've decided to move? What would a bit of consideration cost you?
We do meet somewhere else and she hasn't visited for over 3 weeks, so I am unsure what has prompted her recent e-mail.
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  #110  
Old 21.12.2010, 22:53
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Re: Can my housemate forbid a friend from visiting me?

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Anyway, sorry to spoil your fun boys, but back on topic.....

Housemate has now sent my friend 3 e-mails and 5 sms on this matter. Anyone of the article numbers I should quote for Stalking and Harassment?
Liverbird, call the mieterverband tomorrow - get a professional regarding your rights once and for all.

If I am going by common sense, there is no way that she has a right to tell you which house guests you can, or cannot invite - unless they are making a nuisance of themselves, and what EastEnders has said - theft, forced entry and stalking.

If the Mieterverband's answer is what I am guessing it will be, I will move anyway. There is too much bad blood and bitterness as it is - I certainly wont tolerate anyone pulling rules out of their arses like that. Your housemate is just a vindictive little cow, and a little mad from the sounds of it. I would also simply go over to her calmly, and trash things out. Tell her (nicely but firmly) that you are looking to move but in the meantime, to stop all these nonsense, grow the eff up and stop behaving like a petulant child. Very unclassy. Its been 8 years. Not 8 days. Wrap your words nicely in a christmas bow as you still need to have an easy time moving out but make sure she gets the message.

Jaysus. Good luck with your search and excuse me, whilst I am off to unroll the eyes from the back of my head.
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  #111  
Old 21.12.2010, 22:59
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Re: Can my housemate forbid a friend from visiting me?

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he now insists on taking his OW to our holiday flat that we (OH & I) own.
Sorry, but what are OW and OH?

Tom
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  #112  
Old 21.12.2010, 23:03
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Re: Can my housemate forbid a friend from visiting me?

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Sorry, but what are OW and OH?

Tom
OH = other half
OW = other woman aka homewrecker aka slut yadda yadda
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  #113  
Old 21.12.2010, 23:03
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Re: Can my housemate forbid a friend from visiting me?

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Sorry, but what are OW and OH?

Tom
OH = Other Half

OW I guess is Other Wife, but guessing on that one.

Doc.
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  #114  
Old 21.12.2010, 23:07
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Re: Can my housemate forbid a friend from visiting me?

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OH = other half
OW = other woman aka homewrecker aka slut yadda yadda
And if the "OH" is a woman?

Tom
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  #115  
Old 21.12.2010, 23:24
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Re: Can my housemate forbid a friend from visiting me?

Then the equivalent of OW would be OM - other man
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  #116  
Old 22.12.2010, 01:35
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Re: Can my housemate forbid a friend from visiting me?

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No, I was introduced to my housemate in June of this year as she was looking for someone to rent a room from her and I needed somewhere to live. We got along okay and she said if you want the room you can move in whenever you like. The next time I met her was 2 weeks later when I moved in with all my boxes.
They had and still have been split for 8 years and living in different homes for 3 years.
How many boxes you have then?
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  #117  
Old 22.12.2010, 07:34
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Re: Can my housemate forbid a friend from visiting me?

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Then the equivalent of OW would be OM - other man
Sounds like a mumsnet thing.
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  #118  
Old 22.12.2010, 10:29
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Re: Can my housemate forbid a friend from visiting me?

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Sounds like a mumsnet thing.
Heaven forbid! It's no different from any other common forum abbreviations
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  #119  
Old 03.01.2011, 09:53
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Re: Can my housemate forbid a friend from visiting me?

Hello?! Liverbird??? Helloooo!

I really think we deserve to be told how the Christmas dinner went...
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  #120  
Old 03.01.2011, 12:19
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Re: Can my housemate forbid a friend from visiting me?



that is dumb between friends,,
to go as far as persecution
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