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Old 29.08.2007, 13:43
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Help Needed : Plan to take over the World.

My job is currently extremely rubbish and everyday I have to skip happily into the corporation doors of doom, pretending I care about my Performance indicators and that my boss is really the champion of all things sugary and fluffy.

So I have decided its time to set my own Personal goals...
...I need a cunning plan to take over the world so that I can happily live off Champagne and Twiglets for the rest of my life.
Who's with me and how the hell can I achieve it.
I am thinking a 5 step plan here

1. Need to think up a good Head boss name, like Dr Evil
2. Need to build a secret base, preferably close to a train station and not too far from Zurich so I don't have to get up early to get into work.
3. Need to buy a white cat and practice being bald.
4. Need to develop an obvious weakness, e.g. scared of Geraniums, or my own reflection etc.
5. Need to design a super weapon with a little digital countdown and hire deformed psychotics to man it.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
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  #2  
Old 29.08.2007, 13:51
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Re: Help Needed : Plan to take over the World.

If I may suggest a weapon, could it be something along the lines of a virus that is engineered to attack the DNA of anyone with a gene that causes a prediliction to politics. They have access to the cash, so they'd be more likely to pay up than if you target the general populace.
Failing that, can we build full-size replicas of Martian fightng machines from Jeff Wayne's War Of The Worlds. I'd really, really love to use the heat ray on Birmingham.
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Old 29.08.2007, 13:52
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Re: Help Needed : Plan to take over the World.

http://www.eviloverlord.com/
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Old 29.08.2007, 13:56
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Re: Help Needed : Plan to take over the World.

There can't be any shortage of secret lairs here, what about the nuclear bunker near Luzern, room for you and 20,000 evil henchmen!

http://www.swissinfo.org/eng/interna...=1160978880000
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Old 29.08.2007, 13:58
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Re: Help Needed : Plan to take over the World.

Ah, I wasn't the only one watching Austin Powers last night.

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Old 29.08.2007, 13:59
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Re: Help Needed : Plan to take over the World.

Base beneath the Zürisee, reached by miniature submarine.

Heat Ray is good, target Slough would be ideal, along with the East-end of Glasgow

Fluffy white kitten ? Get yourself a Walrus, more à la mode


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Old 29.08.2007, 14:04
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Re: Help Needed : Plan to take over the World.

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Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
Might I recommend that you don't take the tram to your place of evil doings - would kind of ruin the effect (plus I don't think they let cats on the public transport here, unless you're a mad bag-lady).

Transport should be selected on number of rocket launchers and flame throwers, and ideally be a helicopter piloted by a rough looking thug wearing aviator sunglasses.

Good luck with world domination, failing that, have a look at this week's jobs in the Tages Anzeiger...

Thanks for the chuckle in my lunchtime
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Old 29.08.2007, 14:05
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Re: Help Needed : Plan to take over the World.

or how about sharks with frickin' lasers on their heads?
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Old 29.08.2007, 14:08
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Re: Help Needed : Plan to take over the World.

Bear in mind, there's already an authentic evil lair here in Switzerland, save you starting from scratch.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Piz_Gloria
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Old 29.08.2007, 14:08
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Re: Help Needed : Plan to take over the World.

Well, if the whole evil genius plan to take over the world doesn't work out for you. . I've always wanted a personal assistant

They do have these incredible concrete creations in Vienna left over from the war, perhaps they would work as an super evil lair.

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Old 29.08.2007, 14:11
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Re: Help Needed : Plan to take over the World.

Now that's a lair.
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Old 29.08.2007, 14:12
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Re: Help Needed : Plan to take over the World.

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If I may suggest a weapon, could it be something along the lines of a virus that is engineered to attack the DNA of anyone with a gene that causes a prediliction to politics. .
Not enough flashy red LCD numbers for my liking, its just got no style

Quote:
Heat Ray is good, target Slough would be ideal, along with the East-end of Glasgow
Would targeting Slough not have an adverse affect, I am liable to be thanked as a saviour rather than vilified as the Number one big bad Evil head Chief Itchy Bum that I should be.
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Old 29.08.2007, 14:17
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Re: Help Needed : Plan to take over the World.

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Would targeting Slough not have an adverse affect, I am liable to be thanked as a saviour rather than vilified as the Number one big bad Evil head Chief Itchy Bum
good point ... ok Parliament Square it is ...

also heres a suggestion for scary henchmen ...



the one on the right looks well dodgy to me ....
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Old 29.08.2007, 14:21
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Re: Help Needed : Plan to take over the World.

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Nah, jogging pants and a dress rarely work on the male figure...
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Old 29.08.2007, 14:22
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Re: Help Needed : Plan to take over the World.

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Well, if the whole evil genius plan to take over the world doesn't work out for you. . I've always wanted a personal assistant

They do have these incredible concrete creations in Vienna left over from the war, perhaps they would work as an super evil lair.


Looks like it will have plenty of room for my shark tank, and escape rocket.
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Old 29.08.2007, 14:23
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Re: Help Needed : Plan to take over the World.

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Well, if the whole evil genius plan to take over the world doesn't work out for you. . I've always wanted a personal assistant

They do have these incredible concrete creations in Vienna left over from the war, perhaps they would work as an super evil lair.

v cool ... but not a little conspicous for a secret lair ?
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Old 29.08.2007, 14:27
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Re: Help Needed : Plan to take over the World.

Conspicuous? Perhaps, but they've been there for so long and I believe there are underground tunnels running between them (there are a couple in this particular park, they're over 30 m tall) that no one would notice.

Perhaps so conspicuous that they would never be expected?




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v cool ... but not a little conspicous for a secret lair ?
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Old 29.08.2007, 14:34
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Re: Help Needed : Plan to take over the World.

white cat replacemnet .... meet Fluffy

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Old 29.08.2007, 14:39
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Re: Help Needed : Plan to take over the World.

Dude,

It doesn't matter how hard you try, you can't escape the corporate world anymore.

Even if you find your secret headquarters you will need the guys in suits to manage it.

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Old 29.08.2007, 14:53
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Re: Help Needed : Plan to take over the World.

woohaaa that is one table breaking picture.
Can you size it down so we can see what the suits are staring at?
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