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08.09.2010, 15:52
| Member | | Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: Vaud
Posts: 118
Groaned at 4 Times in 3 Posts
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| | Re: Repertoire of terrible jokes [I challenge you]
Murphy's law:
No matter how long you keep on shake it, the last drop is always for your underwear | 
08.09.2010, 15:55
|  | Forum Legend | | Join Date: Jul 2009 Location: Lummerland
Posts: 5,388
Groaned at 207 Times in 140 Posts
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| | Re: Repertoire of terrible jokes [I challenge you] | Quote: | |  | | | Murphy's law:
No matter how long you keep on shake it, the last drop is always for your underwear  | | | | | Da hilft kein schütteln und auch kein klopfen.. In die Hose geht dein letzte Tropfen.
| 
08.09.2010, 16:25
|  | Forum Veteran | | Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Bern
Posts: 725
Groaned at 11 Times in 10 Posts
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| | Re: Repertoire of terrible jokes [I challenge you]
Two guys on a hike in the alps. After some time one of them starts falling back. The other one asks him if he is allright.
"Not at all, I've got to shit and I'm freezing my ass off".
The other one tells him that there is a small hut about 20 minutes away where they can sit inside to get warm and where he can use the toilet.
5 mins later, the slower one catches up, with a smile on his face.
"You feeling better now?"
"Oh yes, I my ass feels a lot warmer and I don't have to shit anymore..." | 
08.09.2010, 19:36
| Member | | Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: Vaud
Posts: 118
Groaned at 4 Times in 3 Posts
Thanked 55 Times in 41 Posts
| | Re: Repertoire of terrible jokes [I challenge you]
A blind man, right?
He was feelin' his way down the street with this stick, right?
He walked past a fish market
He stopped, he took a deep breath, he said:
Woo, good morning ladies!!!  | 
09.09.2010, 03:53
|  | Forum Veteran | | Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Derwood, MD USA
Posts: 1,005
Groaned at 22 Times in 20 Posts
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| | Re: Repertoire of terrible jokes [I challenge you] | 
09.09.2010, 08:40
|  | Forum Veteran | | Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Bern
Posts: 636
Groaned at 2 Times in 2 Posts
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| | Re: Repertoire of terrible jokes [I challenge you]
What did the Pakistani lady say to the other Pakistani lady?
Do these jeans make my bomb look big?
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09.09.2010, 08:50
|  | Forum Veteran | | Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Bern
Posts: 636
Groaned at 2 Times in 2 Posts
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| | Re: Repertoire of terrible jokes [I challenge you]
Steven and Christian are best of mates, they are also prawns. They are swimming around one day when a magic underwater genie appears before then and grants Steven a wish. He decides that he is sick of being a lowly prawn and wants to be a great white shark. Which the genie grants.
So Steven spends his days at the top of the food chain devouring anything he comes across, but soon gets tired of the carnivourous lifestyle. Luckily he comes across the magical underwater genie again who grants him another wish. Steven says he is sick of being a great white shark and wants to change back to a prawn. Which the genie grants.
Steven tracks down his old mate, but Christian doesn`t recognise him.
"Its me Stephen"
"Stephen who?"
"I`m a prawn again Christian!"
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09.09.2010, 10:06
|  | Junior Member | | Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Unterberg
Posts: 67
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| | Re: Repertoire of terrible jokes [I challenge you]
Little Pauly was misbehaving and was sent to bed.
Uncle Perfesser, who was having dinner with the family, went to see
Pauly in his bedroom and told him, "If you ask God to help you about
your misbehaving, He will help you."
Pauly immediately took his uncle's advice and started praying, "Dear
God, please help me not to get caught quite so much."
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12.09.2010, 09:59
| Newbie 1st class | | Join Date: Sep 2010 Location: Canada
Posts: 20
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| | Re: Repertoire of terrible jokes [I challenge you]
Why did the girl fall off the swing set?
Because she had no arms.
Why did the airplane crash into the mountain?
Because the pilot was a bagel.  Can't get any worse than that...
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12.09.2010, 11:51
|  | Forum Veteran | | Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: Zurich, West-side
Posts: 2,201
Groaned at 8 Times in 7 Posts
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| | Re: Repertoire of terrible jokes [I challenge you]
What's brown and sticky?
A stick.
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12.09.2010, 12:39
| | Re: Repertoire of terrible jokes [I challenge you]
A termite walks into a bar and says "Is the bartender here?"
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12.09.2010, 19:45
|  | Forum Veteran | | Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: Zurich, West-side
Posts: 2,201
Groaned at 8 Times in 7 Posts
Thanked 1,341 Times in 708 Posts
| | Re: Repertoire of terrible jokes [I challenge you]
What's orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot.
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13.09.2010, 09:43
|  | Forum Legend | | Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Zurich
Posts: 4,150
Groaned at 33 Times in 29 Posts
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| | Re: Repertoire of terrible jokes [I challenge you]
How can you find Will Smith in the snow?
Look for the fresh prints.
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13.09.2010, 11:37
|  | Moddy Wellies | | Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: North Yorkshire
Posts: 8,729
Groaned at 53 Times in 47 Posts
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| | Re: Repertoire of terrible jokes [I challenge you]
What's red and invisible? No tomatoes. | 
13.09.2010, 11:52
|  | Forum Veteran | | Join Date: May 2007 Location: Liechtenstein
Posts: 703
Groaned at 2 Times in 2 Posts
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| | Re: Repertoire of terrible jokes [I challenge you]
What's brown and rhymes with snoop?
Puff Daddy.
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13.09.2010, 12:49
| Newbie 1st class | | Join Date: Aug 2010 Location: Horgen
Posts: 10
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| | Re: Repertoire of terrible jokes [I challenge you]
...and 1 more:
I went into a French restaurant but all they had on offer was a boiled egg. The waiter asked if that was ok and I replied: "Yes, un oeuf's as good as a feast".
Sorry.
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13.09.2010, 12:52
|  | Forum Legend | | Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Zurich
Posts: 4,150
Groaned at 33 Times in 29 Posts
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| | Re: Repertoire of terrible jokes [I challenge you] | Quote: | |  | | | What's brown and rhymes with snoop?
Puff Daddy. | | | | |
I liked this joke a lot. Although it would have been better as Dr Dre or someone westcoast.
Puff Daddy doesn't work with Snoop
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13.09.2010, 15:13
|  | Forum Veteran | | Join Date: May 2007 Location: Liechtenstein
Posts: 703
Groaned at 2 Times in 2 Posts
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| | Re: Repertoire of terrible jokes [I challenge you] | Quote: | |  | | | I liked this joke a lot. Although it would have been better as Dr Dre or someone westcoast.
Puff Daddy doesn't work with Snoop | | | | |
Damn... You're right... It is supposed to be Dr Dre... My mind drew a blank with the punchline.
My bad.
And sure Puff Daddy's been rebranded for years.
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13.09.2010, 18:03
|  | Forum Legend | | Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: Top of a Triangle
Posts: 2,992
Groaned at 38 Times in 29 Posts
Thanked 5,673 Times in 2,039 Posts
| | Re: Repertoire of terrible jokes [I challenge you] | Quote: | |  | | | Murphy's law:
No matter how long you keep on shake it, the last drop is always for your underwear  | | | | | | Quote: | |  | | | Da hilft kein schütteln und auch kein klopfen.. In die Hose geht dein letzte Tropfen. | | | | | "No matter how much you shake and dance,
the last little bit drips in your pants"
(boom tish)
| 
13.09.2010, 18:05
| | Re: Repertoire of terrible jokes [I challenge you]
One for the girls : 'how many men does it take to paper a bathroom?'
'Depends how thinly you slice them!'.
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