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-   -   What the !!! of the day (https://www.englishforum.ch/jokes-funnies/32842-what-day.html)

Guest 22.09.2008 21:15

Re: WTF!! of the day?
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by chemgoddess (Post 317882)
Hmmmm. . . . I wasn't sure which "****** of the day" to put this under but I think WTF might be a good place.

And Ummmmmmmmm. . . . . icky. Icky, icky, icky.

http://www.houston-imports.com/forum....php?t=486637/

This is just one of the pics from an apartment that someone was actually 'living in' Blech.
http://www.hi-upload.com/upload/uplo...0133%20013.jpg

That reminds me... I must buy a bottle of Toilet Duck tomorrow...

Lynn88 22.09.2008 21:24

Re: WTF!! of the day?
 
I'm buying 10!

KarlN 22.09.2008 21:34

Re: WTF!! of the day?
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by drsmithy (Post 316538)
This reminds me of one of the funniest things I've ever read:

Cat Bathing As A Martial Art
  1. Know that although the kitty cat has the advantage of quickness and lack of concern for human life, you have the advantage of strength. Capitalize on that advantage by selecting the battlefield. Don't try to bathe him in an open area where he can force you to chase him. Pick a very small bathroom. If your bathroom is more than four feet square, we recommend that you get in the tub with the cat and close the sliding-glass doors as if you were about to take a shower. (A simple shower curtain will not do. A berserk cat can shred a three-ply rubber shower curtain quicker than a politician can shift positions.)
  2. Know that a cat has claws and will not hesitate to remove all the skin from your body. Your advantage here is that you are smart and know how to dress to protect yourself. We recommend canvas overalls tucked into high-top construction boots, a pair of steel-mesh gloves, an army helmet, a hockey face-mask, and a long-sleeved flak jacket.
  3. Use the element of surprise. Pick up your cat nonchalantly, as if to simply carry him to his supper dish. (Cats will not usually notice your strange attire. They have little or no interest in fashion as a rule.)
  4. Once you are inside the bathroom, speed is essential to survival. In a single liquid motion, shut the bathroom door, step into the tub enclosure, slide the glass door shut, dip the cat in the water and squirt him with shampoo. You have now begun one of the wildest 45 seconds of your life.
  5. Cats have no handles. Add the fact that he now has soapy fur, and the problem is radically compounded. Do not expect to hold on to him for more than two or three seconds at a time. When you have him, however, you must remember to give him another squirt of shampoo and rub like crazy. He'll then spring free and fall back into the water, thereby rinsing himself off. (The national record for cats is three latherings, so don't expect too much.)
  6. Next, the cat must be dried. Novice cat bathers always assume this part will be the most difficult, for humans generally are worn out at this point and the cat is just getting really determined. In fact, the drying is simple compared with what you have just been through. That's because by now the cat is semi-permanently affixed to your right leg.
  7. You simply pop the drain plug with your foot, reach for your towel and wait. (Occasionally, however, the cat will end up clinging to the top of your army helmet. If this happens, the best thing you can do is to shake him loose and to encourage him toward your leg.) After all the water is drained from the tub, it is a simple matter to just reach down and dry the cat.In a few days the cat will relax enough to be removed from your leg. He will usually have nothing to say for about three weeks and will spend a lot of time sitting with his back to you. He might even become psychoceramic and develop the fixed stare of a plaster figurine.
You will be tempted to assume he is angry. This isn't usually the case. As a rule he is simply plotting ways to get through your defenses and injure you for life the next time you decide to give him a bath. But at least now he smells a lot better.

Having owned and washed a cat, this was the funniest article ive read in years... i now have to change my pants and dry my tears .... thankyou ..

ElJeFe 22.09.2008 21:59

Re: WTF!! of the day?
 
http://bitsandpieces.us/wp-content/u...rnet-thumb.jpg

Rustygraben 22.09.2008 22:17

Re: WTF!! of the day?
 
Maybe this has already been posted in the cat thread.

http://www.littlemikey.com/images/WTF_Cat.jpg

mirfield 22.09.2008 23:11

Re: WTF!! of the day?
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by vwild1 (Post 317369)
Shoot him in the toodles grandma..!!


It's like a cross between John McCain and Sarah Palin....

Lorenheim 23.09.2008 08:35

Re: WTF!! of the day?
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by chemgoddess (Post 317882)
but I think WTF might be a good place.

http://i72.photobucket.com/albums/i1...8083081oh5.gif

23.09.2008 15:48

Re: WTF!! of the day?
 
Breast milk menu too titillating for diners :confused:
A restaurant has been banned from serving up dishes containing human milk on the grounds that the "ingredient" derives from an unauthorised source.
Quote:

Locher had planned to serve up human milk in dishes of soup, antelope steak with sauce and the classic dish of Zürcher Geschnetzeltes – bite sized pieces of meat in a creamy sauce. The Storchen, which coincidentally means Stork in English, would have served up these delicacies during a series of special offer weeks.

Downerbuzz 26.09.2008 21:51

Re: WTF!! of the day?
 
Can't seem to embed this properly so here's a link :

Shakira feat Danzig:


swissotter 27.09.2008 18:42

Re: WTF!! of the day?
 
http://media.tumblr.com/5iKOt5ZqV9e3...vneDnK_400.jpg

Caleb 28.09.2008 15:09

Re: WTF!! of the day?
 
http://img440.imageshack.us/img440/227/67233886ca0.jpg

http://img510.imageshack.us/img510/2752/57298057gb5.jpg

http://img523.imageshack.us/img523/2844/27344662mg0.jpg

Sada 28.09.2008 17:58

Re: WTF!! of the day?
 
Where is this Caleb?

Caleb 29.09.2008 09:23

Re: WTF!! of the day?
 
I honestly don't remember. I must have visited a "funny pics" website some time ago, and saved them to my hard drive.

Guest 29.09.2008 10:04

Re: WTF!! of the day?
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Sada (Post 321887)
Where is this Caleb?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Caleb (Post 322082)
I honestly don't remember. I must have visited a "funny pics" website some time ago, and saved them to my hard drive.

It looks like one of the hauliers' strikes which have happened over the last few years protesting over fuel prices or some such thing.

They blocked up the motorways around France/Italy.

NBP 29.09.2008 10:35

Re: WTF!! of the day?
 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sfe6nY5qmQY

PatriciaNBern 29.09.2008 11:09

Re: WTF!! of the day?
 
Quote:

It looks like one of the hauliers' strikes which have happened over the last few years protesting over fuel prices or some such thing.

They blocked up the motorways around France/Italy.
You know what... i think i remember that.

PatriciaNBern 29.09.2008 11:14

Re: WTF!! of the day?
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by NBP (Post 322148)

Whoa... i found that i bit.... yeah, distrubing, and I'm a Christian. Now i know what a highly charismatic church looks like.

Sada 29.09.2008 14:05

Re: WTF!! of the day?
 
What is Sexy ?


Conor 29.09.2008 14:09

Re: WTF!! of the day?
 
Heron V Rabbit!

Not for the faint hearted or fans of Watership Down!

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/earth/mai...eaheron129.xml

29.09.2008 15:04

Re: WTF!! of the day?
 


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