Can anyone help to translate this message?

"Viele dank fur dis email. ich hoffe, dass du inzwusch weisch, dass ich mit de Pam in ere glukliche beziehig bin und Stanford ihre wirde zame zieh. ich hans Gfuehl, dass du nonig abgschlosse hasch mit eusere beziehig und mochti darum nachschter zit kontackt meh ha. ich hoffe du gsesch das nod als personlich agriff und dass du glucklich i dinere beziehig bisch."

What language is it supposed to be written in?

Swiss German (Zurich area)

I don't speak Swiss German, and am not great at high German, but I'll try.
Hopefully someone more knowledgable will come along.


Many thanks for your email. I hope that you know meanwhile that I am in a happy relationship with Pam, and Stanford ????
I have the feeling that you?? with our relationship and because of that would like next time that you contact me.
I hope you do not see this as a personal attack and that you are happy in your relationship.

Thank you. That was helpful. Last one?

"Groeschti aller liebesgoettine,
danke fuer dis verstaendnis, ich freue mich extrem uf dich. dass ich daenn aendich wieder chan abcho. liebe dich ueber alles und wuensche dir fuer de Eltereabig alles gueti. Waenn noch chli unterstuetzigs - Skype wetsch vorher. schrib mer eifach es Mail."

"I want to milk your man-bits, we can do it over Skype if you want"

What does the whole thing say?

greetings all my lovelies, thanks for your understanding, I want to milk your man-bits. I just had to sneeze. Love you lots and wish you a nice evening with your oldies. When you want to get it, Skype with no clothes. If you can't do that, send me an email"

Really? Wow.

Erm, no, it doesn't mean that. But it is a load of BS if you ask me. Also, are you sure you have typed exactly what was written? I feel there are a few crucial words missing. And - why would someone write in Swiss German to someone who apparently doesn't understand it? Or are you snooping? Snooping is baaaaad.

So what does it actually mean? even if it is BS?

As I suspect you are snooping in someone else's communications, I think you should ask the person who got the message.

You are right Kittster

Thank you very much for your email. I hope that meanwhile you know that I'm and in a Happy Relationship with Pam, and I will move in with (or to) Standfor with her. I have the feeling you are not over us(you and the person who sent you the message). And want to have contact in the next time (days) (I guess he/she wanted to say I don't want to have any contact with you for a while). I hope you don't take it as personal offense and that you are happy in your relationship.

I must Say this person don't writes very well the swiss german.

Thank you very much for the clearer translation.

well, the problem is, that is Swiss German there are no real rules; write the way you feel - so Swiss German (at least writing) is easier than "High German"