... or Americans as we call them. Us blue-blooded English would never of made such mistakes.

(see what I did there? )

This Thread is getting very off-topic. Incorrect spellings and grammar mistakes have been dealt with in a Thread which started life as 'Non-native English Common Mistakes' and as we discovered that 'Native English' sadly doesn't mean 'perfect English spelling and grammar' either it has a bit of both.

Could we get back to New English Words please? Otherwise I might as well merge the two and incur the wrath of those who started it on the correct path.

C - Big blue wobbly thing that mermaids live in.

Back on topic...

Just a couple which came up recently:

Kangaroo Feathers = Kangaroo Springs (feathers? whut? no idea where that one came from!)

Wash Disher = (obviously!) Dishwasher

Awailable = Available (yes, that 'v' is hard to pronounce...)

And just for the record...I love the Swiss and Switzerland, I am eternally grateful to them for speaking English when and if they can, and my Schweezerin colleague really doesn't mind when I post her funny words here, honest

I am certainly not trying to lambast them for making mistakes... one day I may be able to make similar unwitting funnies in Schveezer Dootch and have them posted on an equivalent Swiss website... but as my Schweezer Dootch just isn't coming on as well as I had hoped it would ("I'll be fluent in six months " HAHAHAHA)... that day eludes me.

Feder in German = spring and feather(s) in English. Easy!

What does that mean. None of those plurals are correct in proper American English either.

Er . . . read what Assassin wrote again. He isn't saying that they are correct in American English.

Got a fax from Canada written by an educated young lady : Will defiantly come in July, it could of been earlier.

The 'of' is worse than the 'defiantly'. Maybe the 'of' was an expression of defiance?

Mice = Maize
To go under the shower = Take a shower
Fleas = Fleece

You gotta love it though

The French have invented some ridiculous 'English' words like

un parking

le brushing (blow-dry_

le footing (jogging)

le pressing (dry cleaners)

and of course sweatshirts are called 'un sweet'.

serviette instead of napkin

and I've heard some UK kids ask if they were having dinner when it was actually lunchtime and their mother confirmed it.

The dinner / supper / lunch issue was treated here. Quintessence: Even native English speakers are in disagreement on what meal is to be called dinner.

Well, to be fair, dinner and lunch have always been confusing. Back in school, we had school dinners, and the dinner bell, and dinner ladies, and dinner time, but if you wanted you could bring in a packed lunch. Then in the evening you couldn't call it dinner because you'd already had that, so we called it 'teatime', as in 'come for your tea', 'tea's ready', etc. (we didn't drink tea as kids, we only ate our tea). Only later did I realise that some people called tea dinner, and dinner lunch, and that some people even had 'afternoon tea', which was something else entirely, and is supper the same as tea or a bedtime snack?,...
I think all those things are very regional.

Edit: Oops, beaten by Captain Greybeard. And many others!

Apologies to re-visit the 'Learnings' debate.

However my past and present companies, both large Austrian & Swiss-German owned Global businesses, have happily adopted this word in most communications. Including training programs and global meetings.

It has become so prevalent within the business, I have needed to adopt it myself in order to communicate - I'm not happy about this....

My favourite word which I have encountered from many new German speaking recruits (including my Swiss wife, many years ago) is 'Park House' (this is a literal translation of Parkhaus / Car Park)

This isn't bad English, it's merely class-based vocabulary difference.

You're Scottish, but you never had school dinners in the dinner-hall ?!?!?

Grew up in Canada, we had school lunch

Grew up in Switzerland - we had lunch at ... home

"Chief" for boss, manager, coordinator, director etc.