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Old 19.03.2012, 23:11
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Warning! Swiss planning may offend.

A friend of mine, (EU Female), was asked back in November if she wanted to go on holiday with some office colleagues. She replied that she needed to think about it.

Now she has decided to go with them and has just told them this news. However they told her that as she hadn't replied they had booked the flights & hotels back in January without her. Well she said, tell me where you are going and I will make my own arrangements at the same hotel. No they replied, you can't do that. We decided you weren't interested in our holiday plans and now you cannot join us!

Ever heard anything like that before?
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Old 19.03.2012, 23:13
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Re: Warning! Swiss planning may offend.

No, but it does not surprise me.
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Old 19.03.2012, 23:16
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Re: Warning! Swiss planning may offend.

Possibly ( just guessing) the collegues are a bit peeved, thinking that they may be second choice for holidaying with. Alternatively, in the meantime, they have added another person to the group and want to keep numbers even ( esp if sharing hotel twin rooms, cars etc. )

I bet your friend can arrange a superb holiday by herself and not miss those colleagues at all.
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Old 19.03.2012, 23:26
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Re: Warning! Swiss planning may offend.

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A friend of mine, (EU Female), was asked back in November if she wanted to go on holiday with some office colleagues. She replied that she needed to think about it.

Now she has decided to go with them and has just told them this news. However they told her that as she hadn't replied they had booked the flights & hotels back in January without her. Well she said, tell me where you are going and I will make my own arrangements at the same hotel. No they replied, you can't do that. We decided you weren't interested in our holiday plans and now you cannot join us!

Ever heard anything like that before?
She waited five months to give an answer? Their response seems reasonable to me.
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Old 19.03.2012, 23:51
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Re: Warning! Swiss planning may offend.

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She waited five months to give an answer? Their response seems reasonable to me.
That was my initial feeling as well... Then I got to thinking it would've been kinda nice though if her colleagues had mentioned it to her again just before they went to book.

Seems a tad harsh that they've refused to let her join off her own steam. Is there more to the story, perhaps?..

It does sound rather odd and if that's their collective attitude, then personally I wouldn't want them as my holiday buddies and would be glad to just keep our relationship purely professional.
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Old 19.03.2012, 23:57
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Re: Warning! Swiss planning may offend.

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That was my initial feeling as well... Then I got to thinking it would've been kinda nice though if her colleagues had mentioned it to her again just before they went to book.

Seems a tad harsh that they've refused to let her join off her own steam. Is there more to the story, perhaps?..

It does sound rather odd and if that's their collective attitude, then personally I wouldn't want them as my holiday buddies and would be glad to just keep our relationship purely professional.
I agree, I found it a bit childish to be honest.... But like mentioned earlier, we don't have all the infos.
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Old 20.03.2012, 00:30
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Re: Warning! Swiss planning may offend.

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Possibly ( just guessing) the collegues are a bit peeved, thinking that they may be second choice for holidaying with.
To be honest, I wouldn't like either being on stand-by for 5 months, this would annoy me.

However, I would give credit there was a clear "no" in the first place and later something like "there has been a change in plans, so if you have spare space, I could come".

It's perfectly reasonable to have some people as "first" choice, others as "second", others as "third". You just can't say yes to everyone. But, for me, being honest and admitting something like "sorry, I have other plans in mind" is perfectly fine - and human.

So, I wouldn't call it a "swiss" habit.
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Old 20.03.2012, 06:10
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Re: Warning! Swiss planning may offend.

They were more then reasonable, she waited so onlg they needed to book to get the rooms and flights at a decent price and available.

Serves her right would do the same in many countries this is not just a swiss thing its called bothering to be interested!!
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Old 20.03.2012, 07:50
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Re: Warning! Swiss planning may offend.

Maybe these colleagues were not genuinely interested in going to holiday together and asked only to be polite? Because they could have asked again, shortly before booking. And then how all the planning and preparations before the booking escaped the attention of your friend?

I would not say that this affair is particularly Swiss, office intrigues can blossom anywhere.
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Old 20.03.2012, 08:42
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Re: Warning! Swiss planning may offend.

Why would anyone in their right mind want to holiday with their office colleagues in the first place? It's bad enough you spend 40-odd hours a week with them, but to spend vacation time with them too?
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Old 20.03.2012, 08:53
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Re: Warning! Swiss planning may offend.

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A friend of mine, (EU Female), was asked back in November if she wanted to go on holiday with some office colleagues. She replied that she needed to think about it.

Now she has decided to go with them and has just told them this news. However they told her that as she hadn't replied they had booked the flights & hotels back in January without her. Well she said, tell me where you are going and I will make my own arrangements at the same hotel. No they replied, you can't do that. We decided you weren't interested in our holiday plans and now you cannot join us!

Ever heard anything like that before?
I think if I was asked that that then the word "NO" would have come out of my mouth before the sentence was even finished.

OK, I can't assume that everybody has the same attitude as me, but as far as I'm concerned the people I work with are the people I work with, the people I socialise with are the people I socialise with, and with luck their paths shall never cross.

While I think her colleagues are being somewhat off with her, personally I would look on the bright side, and consider myself to have dodged a very large bullet.
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Old 20.03.2012, 10:09
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Re: Warning! Swiss planning may offend.

I can totally understand why some prefer not to cross the lines and keep their professional and private lives completely separate.

However, from direct experience, I think it's very possible to become good personal buddies with someone you met via work. One just has to take time about it and not rush as that could be a costly mistake...

The work/personal buddies crossover has happened to me here and in UK, albeit over quite a long period of time eg hanging out at work during coffee breaks, lunch, work organized events.

Then at some point its moved almost imperceptibly to the personal stage such as hanging out in the evenings or at weekends sometimes eg cinema, shopping, lunching, parties, BBQs etc.

Even though they or I have moved on to pastures new, we remain good friends, some of these quite some years later. The important factor is that we took the time to get to know, like, trust and respect one another as work colleagues first and only then moved on to becoming personal buddies from there because we shared similar girlie interests and stuff.

One of my best friends, an American and based in New York, is someone I met through work in the early 90s. One of the loveliest holidays I've ever had was was when I spent Thanksgiving one year with her and the family. It was absolutely awesome.
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