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Old 22.07.2021, 20:02
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Re: Deleting My Account

Interestingly I considered deleting my account a few months ago when I did not like the direction it was heading.

Instead of deleting I decided it would to be better to try to change the forum & make it a better place for everyone. I believe I have started the ball rolling in the right direction & the forum has an exciting future.
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  #382  
Old 22.07.2021, 20:17
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Re: Deleting My Account

Do you think it's a more inclusive place after so many folks left or are thinking of leaving e.g. - OP? In my opinion, many of us are still here because it's addictive, designed to be addictive and keep us all in some sort of dopamine loop, not necessarily because it has improved. In fact I see the same people/users arguing and arguing and trying to impose their views or at least to have the last word in any given conversation. Sure, we can hope though.

I truly hope it will change because quite a few folks I like socialise(ed) here.
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  #383  
Old 22.07.2021, 20:43
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Re: Deleting My Account

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Do you think it's a more inclusive place after so many folks left or are thinking of leaving e.g. - OP? In my opinion, many of us are still here because it's addictive, designed to be addictive and keep us all in some sort of dopamine loop, not necessarily because it has improved. In fact I see the same people/users arguing and arguing and trying to impose their views or at least to have the last word in any given conversation. Sure, we can hope though.

I truly hope it will change because quite a few folks I like socialise(ed) here.
Plenty of folk left 18 months ago, so presumably they were not happy with the direction of the forum then. Some of those have returned & are threatening to leave again because they don't like the changes, you could not make it up

The world did change over the last year, people became frightened of leaving the house, something we could not have imagined 2 years ago. Tolerance of people with differing views has reduced, this is very sad.

The forum has to accept different point's of view & not ban people because they have a differing view, moderators are not supposed to be 'Arbiters of Truth'. Facebook has started to do this, I find it deeply worrying.
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  #384  
Old 22.07.2021, 20:56
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Re: Deleting My Account

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Do you think it's a more inclusive place after so many folks left or are thinking of leaving e.g. - OP? In my opinion, many of us are still here because it's addictive, designed to be addictive and keep us all in some sort of dopamine loop, not necessarily because it has improved. In fact I see the same people/users arguing and arguing and trying to impose their views or at least to have the last word in any given conversation. Sure, we can hope though.

I truly hope it will change because quite a few folks I like socialise(ed) here.
Often threads I like are full of trolls which are discouraging.
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  #385  
Old 22.07.2021, 21:06
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Re: Deleting My Account

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I can disagree with someone's perspective, but if I see they are putting a lot of effort into reseaching to help others with links and info, or taking the time to explain their ideas as kindly as possible, then the onus is on me to show appreciation for the effort they are making, I would say.
Blessed are you, that you can feel that appreciation and gratitude! Increasingly, I think that gratitude is perhaps one of the poles to drama, and to unkindness.

Yes, difference of opinions can, when expressed with care, be interesting, and are often educational. I just don't see any useful point to those posts or private messages that turn nasty, and I'm sorry you've received any. I wish those who're tempted to hammer in some ugly words could just give their fingers something else to do, for a while, until they've managed to become calmer or at least more collected.
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I care about what the behaviour demonstrates - ingratitude, a rush to wound, but not to uplift.
This, exactly, yes. Thank you.
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  #386  
Old 22.07.2021, 21:26
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Re: Deleting My Account

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Often threads I like to troll are full of posters with differing views which are discouraging.
ftfy
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  #387  
Old 22.07.2021, 21:41
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Re: Deleting My Account

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ftfy
Matthew 21:16
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  #388  
Old 22.07.2021, 21:58
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Re: Deleting My Account

Sometimes I think the Internet has a way of making people feel very strongly opinionated... Perhaps more strongly opinionated than they are in the real world. Even to a point where they begin to see everything in black and white, when sometimes the truth might lie in the gray area.

I don't know...

But THIS shit needs to stop:
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  #389  
Old 22.07.2021, 23:09
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Re: Deleting My Account

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Sometimes I think the Internet has a way of making people feel very strongly opinionated... Perhaps more strongly opinionated than they are in the real world. Even to a point where they begin to see everything in black and white, when sometimes the truth might lie in the gray area.

I don't know...

But THIS shit needs to stop:
Are real-life opponents any less opinionated? Were they ever?
There's probably a sea of blood shed in in the US alone between the BLM riots and Kent State shooting 50 years ago, where the Ohio national guard killed 4, and wounded 9 more, US students.

How can there be a discussion with someone who thinks she knows what others think? Not talking about you specifically here, you just provided the latest exhibit. Or with someone who has the audacity to define how others have to behave and react?
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  #390  
Old 22.07.2021, 23:58
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Re: Deleting My Account

While I agree with the sentiment of your post, the emoji shows purely uni-directional poking. I don't think your intent is to say it is uni-directional. If so, then it demonstrates where the problem really lies...

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Sometimes I think the Internet has a way of making people feel very strongly opinionated... Perhaps more strongly opinionated than they are in the real world. Even to a point where they begin to see everything in black and white, when sometimes the truth might lie in the gray area.

I don't know...

But THIS shit needs to stop:
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  #391  
Old 23.07.2021, 00:14
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Re: Deleting My Account

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Are real-life opponents any less opinionated? Were they ever?
There's probably a sea of blood shed in in the US alone between the BLM riots and Kent State shooting 50 years ago, where the Ohio national guard killed 4, and wounded 9 more, US students.

How can there be a discussion with someone who thinks she knows what others think? Not talking about you specifically here, you just provided the latest exhibit. Or with someone who has the audacity to define how others have to behave and react?
I‘m curious why you mentioned Kent State and BLM. I‘m just trying to understand why you mention them together almost like bookends. In Part,I guess I’m asking because there was plenty of bloodshed before 1970. thanks.
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  #392  
Old 23.07.2021, 00:44
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Re: Deleting My Account

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I‘m curious why you mentioned Kent State and BLM. I‘m just trying to understand why you mention them together almost like bookends. In Part,I guess I’m asking because there was plenty of bloodshed before 1970. thanks.
No particular reason, I just see no use in going back till Adam and Eve. Feel free to expand the list.
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  #393  
Old 23.07.2021, 00:50
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Re: Deleting My Account

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No particular reason, I just see no use in going back till Adam and Eve. Feel free to expand the list.
Nope, 50 Years is probably sufficient.
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  #394  
Old 23.07.2021, 05:53
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Re: Deleting My Account

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…….
My rep also shows this - I've received nasty messages, when someone disagrees with me (and I'm not a nasty, mean-spirited poster intent on causing hurt), but there's silence when I help them on a thread or help others.

I don't care about the rep per se, nor the comments, as I won't ever fight fire with fire. I care about what the behaviour demonstrates - ingratitude, a rush to wound, but not to uplift.
I'd been using the forum for 5 or 6 years before one day discovering, purely by chance, these hidden rep messages. I was staggered that I’d had all these behind-the-scenes personal comments without ever being aware. I don’t think I’ve ever been back to check what more might have appeared. Too apprehensive about the unpleasant ones!
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  #395  
Old 23.07.2021, 07:08
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Re: Deleting My Account

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How can there be a discussion with someone who thinks she knows what others think? [/U]Not talking about you specifically here, you just provided the latest exhibit. [U]Or with someone who has the audacity to define how others have to behave and react?
Indeed. How? I haven't found a proper solution yet, so I definitely won't.
I didn't find a way to not care at all about how some communicate here, mind, not necessarily about their ideas but the way they see fit to address other people while expressing them, so they're on my ignore list.
What we don't put up with in real life, mostly because we don't encounter people with certain personalities or ideas on a regular basis, we or at least some of us won't put up with on EF either.
There's a reason for the Ignore list function. Perhaps everyone should think of using it more often, otherwise we'll be running in circles.

As for certain agendas: fine, you write your piece and allow others the space to take note of your opinion and make whatever they want out of it - who knows you might change their opinion. Or not. But that shouldn't be the ultimate goal of a discussion.
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  #396  
Old 23.07.2021, 07:16
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Re: Deleting My Account

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I'd been using the forum for 5 or 6 years before one day discovering, purely by chance, these hidden rep messages.
How can I view those hidden rep msgs?? Maybe members have been sending me nudes, hot notes etc. and I dont even know it
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  #397  
Old 23.07.2021, 07:23
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Re: Deleting My Account

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How can there be a discussion with someone who thinks she knows what others think? [/U]Not talking about you specifically here, you just provided the latest exhibit. [U]Or with someone who has the audacity to define how others have to behave and react?
What I find amusing is how people have expectations.. I mean, even within our own family we all have someone with whom it is impossible to have a long normal conversation ... and this is how it is in all human interactions -everywhere- since ever and a forum can not be any different.
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  #398  
Old 23.07.2021, 08:00
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Re: Deleting My Account

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I'd been using the forum for 5 or 6 years before one day discovering, purely by chance, these hidden rep messages. I was staggered that I’d had all these behind-the-scenes personal comments without ever being aware. I don’t think I’ve ever been back to check what more might have appeared. Too apprehensive about the unpleasant ones!
I thought I should check for you, no nasty messages, just friendly stuff.
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Old 23.07.2021, 10:46
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Re: Deleting My Account

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Do you think it's a more inclusive place after so many folks left or are thinking of leaving e.g. - OP? In my opinion, many of us are still here because it's addictive, designed to be addictive and keep us all in some sort of dopamine loop, not necessarily because it has improved. In fact I see the same people/users arguing and arguing and trying to impose their views or at least to have the last word in any given conversation. Sure, we can hope though.

I truly hope it will change because quite a few folks I like socialise(ed) here.
I think there is maybe some perceptual distortion when it comes to the droves who are apparently leaving . Many of those leaving have left before and then returned and there is only so often you can cry wolf .

Typically when somebody leaves they start a thread and there is a lot of smoke and attention . When somebody joins or returns it is barely acknowledged . So if you look at the outrage and not at the facts , you can indeed think the forum is on the verge of extinction when in fact it isn’t

I think by and large the forum has become more open and we are seeing a greater diversity of views than under the old moderators . I don’t see how that can be a bad thing
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Old 23.07.2021, 11:00
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Re: Deleting My Account

When a tree falls it makes more noise in the 20 seconds that it falls than it did in the 20 years that it took to grow .

If you go by the noise alone you’d think trees will soon be extinct .
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