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  #81  
Old 04.08.2011, 17:34
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Re: Seperation update

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Last night amid tears i finally gathered courage to call the other man
You had his phone number?
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  #82  
Old 04.08.2011, 18:17
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Re: Seperation update

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iam really confused now, any advice?
Book a marriage counselor for both of you, today!

They will ask some tough questions like:

Do you want to rescue your marriage?

If one of you says "No" then you have to move on....

If one of you says "I don't know" then you have to ask yourself will you work on it, with the knowledge that you may fail?

If you work on it, and it still fails, at least you can put your hand on your heart and say you tried. That's better than not trying, and then not knowing what would have happened if you had of tried.....

At all times uphold your integrity, don't begin another relationship until the existing one is finished. Otherwise, how could you live with yourself?
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  #83  
Old 04.08.2011, 18:24
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Re: Seperation update

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I would like to thank all of you who contributed and the much useful advice, i got. Yesterday morning my wife bid me goodbye as i was moving out of our marital home. Last night amid tears i finally gathered courage to call the other man and asked him if he was happy that, he finally broke my marriage, he was soo sorry, he thought we were seperated, and promised me he would end it today. To my suprise my wife called me crying after, that the man has broke up with her and can i please move back to the house, now she is calling every 10minutes pleading i go back, iam really confused now, any advice?
So she was ready to leave you for that much?
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  #84  
Old 04.08.2011, 18:28
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Re: Separation

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Why do I get this strong feeling that the OP is ...

Oh, never mind me. I'm just cynical.
Yeap, yeap, same here.

Good luck, mate, whatever you do.
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Old 04.08.2011, 18:32
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Re: Seperation update

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I would think that this calls for couples counseling.
"We're not yet where I would like us to be after this first session ... "
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  #86  
Old 04.08.2011, 18:54
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Re: Seperation update

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iam really confused now, any advice?
I would advise you to get professional help and not take snap advice from people who are counciling you to make a decision that is only yours and your wife's to make.

Please do not follow what people are saying that you should just leave her!!! You need to make this decision yourself and I would most strongly recommend that you seek professional guidance.

Talk everything through, do not make snap deicsions that are going to effect the rest of your life based on what outsiders that know little of the real situation are saying!!!
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  #87  
Old 05.08.2011, 09:42
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Re: Separation

I'm finding it hard to believe that this thread survived......
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Old 05.08.2011, 09:49
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Re: Separation

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I'm finding it hard to believe that this thread survived......
You are not alone
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  #89  
Old 05.08.2011, 09:52
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Re: Separation

I have strong feeling about cheating. I learned through this forum that some people don't see it as a big deal like I do. So I won't give any advise. Best of luck OP. Do what you feel is right for you.
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Old 09.08.2011, 16:01
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Re: Separation

Dear Alex,

Decision is merely yours... Just as a humanitary consideration, why dont you give a second chance to your wife?? But again its all your decision...

Best wishes,

Sam
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  #91  
Old 09.08.2011, 16:12
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Re: Separation

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Dear Alex,

Decision is merely yours... Just as a humanitary consideration, why dont you give a second chance to your wife?? But again its all your decision...

Best wishes,

Sam
With all due respect to everyone here including the OP, why the hell would you even think about listening to any advice from a bunch of strangers on the internet (even the well meaning ones) about such an important issue?

Even if we were all experts in our fields of love, emotions, friendships, sex and nuclear physics, what difference would it make? You can only tell us your side of the story, there are always two halves. It's your life, make your call and be prepared to live with the decisions you make.

I'll have to loosely quote Uncle Max on this one (very loosely indeed), for the sake of your sanity and your own piece of mind, I wouldn't bring your personal situations to this vulture's nest.

Good luck bud.
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  #92  
Old 09.08.2011, 16:39
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Re: Separation

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OP, why the hell would you even think about listening to any advice from a bunch of strangers on the internet
Occasionally a person is all alone, nobody to turn to, at their wits end and cannot function anymore in a complete vacuum of isolation.

They may then find no other options to turn to strangers, be they on the Internet, in a bar or just anywhere. Sometimes it is easier to talk to people on the Internet where you can break down quietly by yourself but still be in contact with another human being who just might have an iota of an understanding of where you are coming from. Sometimes this is all that stands between some of us and insanity.

It does not sounds like you have ever experienced this sort of despair and I sincerely hope that you never have to....but know if you do, there will be strangers out there on forums who will be willing to offer some human contact, occasionally heart felt, occasionally critical, sometimes useful and other times not, but never the less it is always the preference over sitting alone in a dark place and letting the whole thing eat away at you.
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  #93  
Old 09.08.2011, 16:53
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Re: Separation

Alex, in an earlier post I told you that if you give in now, she will make you pay for this for the rest of your life.
Its still the case.
Anyone that leaves you for someone else who "said" remorsefully breaks off the deal ie wasnt that interested anyway, now wants to be back with you - until she meets somebody else- you are going to get screwed again.

Take the pain now and it will make you stronger later on. Ive been there, so I wouldnt advise you unless I knew how it felt, but don`t give in because you will go through this all over again - to the peverse pleasure of your cheating partner.
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