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Old 06.04.2013, 16:35
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My cat and the neighbor

I know many people have the same problem, and I come here to look for some support. Long story, sorry, but I have to get it out of my system!

I have a 5 year old cat. He is red and has his own temper (I got him from a refuge as a 3 month old kitty). My cat loves people, so he is showing off to anyone passing by and they all stop to rub him and he loves that.
He is the kind of cat who follows me to the supermarket (walks behind me like a dog), waits outside and comes back home with me. He is also the kind of cat who will come and get me, if I am chatting with someone outside, bite my leg a little and show me very clearly that I should come home. He is very different from other cats I have known and there is no telling him what to do.

He can't stand not having freedom. He sleeps a lot (well he is a cat!) and when he does not, he likes to be at the window, in out, in out... etc.

I moved once because of him. My neighbor was going crazy because his cats were reacting to my cat's presence by peeing on his bed (at least, this was his version, dah!).

The second time around, people came to me and complained that I shoul dnot let my cat go out when it rains, because it is terrible for a cat to be in the rain. I did not move. I pretended that I knew nothing and asked them "what can I do, he does want to go out..." so I had to listen to their advise on how to deal with my cat.

He goes to visit people and of course, since I am a foreigner, the only reason why he does that has to be because I do not give him enough love, enough food, enough care.
However, everyone around eventually fell in love with him and understood his special character, and left me (nearly) in peace.

I was still accused of abusing him because I went to work and he was indoors all day (sleeping!)... This apparently is not ok for a cat (even though by nature, they sleep about 20 to 22 hours per day! I think what was more bugging for them was the fact that a single (foreign) Mum was working full time.... This seems to be a no-no...

I moved to a new place and my "old neighbor" (from my former flat) wrote to me and demanded to know the reasons why I abandoned my cat when I moved.
My cat was then relaxing on my bed so I simply sent a photo and asked "you mean, this cat?" I got no answer. They saw a cat looking like mine (many red cats are similar!) and immediately assumed that the foreigner had left her cat behind.

I had been here 2 days when the neighbor came to complain that she would call the police on me because my cat was on the balcony for one hour "asking" to come in and I did not let him in. This was between 5am and 6am in the morning. The neighbor said the cat was "knocking" on my balcony door. Dah! I was sleeping! She said that I must let him go out. I explained that I just moved but she objected and said the cat should be outside. pfff! I thought "how rude" and I closed my door.

Now, 6 months down the line, she feeds my cat, because I obviously don't feed him (if I did he would not eat her food). She used to bring food in front of my door (in my garden, even if I locked the gate). I told her to not do that, so now she feeds him in her house.
He sleeps here, and he does not stay at my window anymore, as soon as I open for him, he goes to the neighbor's home, waits at the door and eventually disappears inside. He does not eat here much. He had become quite fat (I did not know why) and now I pay attention.
She says that he obviously does not recieve enough love because he comes to her for rubs.
The other night, my cat went out at 20:00 and at 21:00 she came to ring my bell to tell me to let him in because it was "too cold." We live in a village where everyone has at least 2 cats, there are tens of cats outside, but she seems only concerned about mine. She said it is because I abuse the cat and do not take care, so she cannot stand this.
When she is home, she stays in front of her door and speaks to everyone passing by. My cat was with her on Thursday and she kept showing people my house. I wondered why everyone just listened.

I am asking the Tierschutz for a letter and I wanted to go to the police, Surprise, the police is her and her husband!! This is a new development. The former tenant told me that it was better to be in good terms with them, and this is why no one crosses them, because if not, this woman made your life miserable. She said it happened before.

I don't know what to do. I feel like I am living near "la famiglia"... or the Cartel people or something... I definitely cannot move, but I am having a really hard time. I can't sleep in on week ends, because I am worried of what will happen if she finds my cat outside (he goes out around 5am every day)... I am stressed out everytime he goes out and now that I see him going to her door, even more...

It is my tragedy of the moment... as if I needed that. I thought she was just nosy and had nothing else to do, now I am worried...
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Old 06.04.2013, 16:40
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Re: My cat and the neighbor

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He is also the kind of cat who will come and get me, if I am chatting with someone outside, bite my leg a little and show me very clearly that I should come home.
I would get rid of any cat that thought it could bite me with impunity. Problem solved.
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Old 06.04.2013, 16:44
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Re: My cat and the neighbor

Have some backbone and tell her outright to stop feeding your cat, because it is just encouraging it to go to her house. Who cares if her husband is the police, she is just being a nosey pest and you can't let her dictate how you live your life, especially if it is causing you genuine stress.

Last edited by Chuff; 06.04.2013 at 18:26.
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Old 06.04.2013, 18:25
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Re: My cat and the neighbor

I would give her two cats as a present...considering the previous experience, they will soon start to pee on her bed...

Or you could put a dead mouse inside their mailbox.

Or you could ask them not to feed your cat, as you don't want him to become fat as them.

No honestly, I have two little cats and they're 4 months old now, we just started letting them out through a cat door...it's very handy and they can go in and out whenever they want (even with rain or snow!) and so far no complaint from neighbours...but they're still exploring the territory around the house.

I don't know what kind of house you're living in, but a cat door is quite handy.

And don't forget to write an anonymous letter to your old neighbours saying "f*** off"
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Old 06.04.2013, 18:33
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Re: My cat and the neighbor

simple.. tell her the cat is on a special diet because someone has been feeding it and they are giving the cat normal food and the vet says it could kill the cat.

and If she continues to feed the cat then she will be liable for the vet fees.
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Old 06.04.2013, 18:47
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Re: My cat and the neighbor

ignore,ignore ,ignore.

these people will destroy your life when it comes to it.
Usually all they need is one freakout from you. She has not one leg to stand on. Tell her to leave you alone or you will put in formal complaints against her and her husband . Police will want to tend that of their record. Just enjoy your living space and let her be. you can even go as far of accusing her to poison your cat....just to be back in her face. Just be smart about it and play her game for a while until she finds something else to do.
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Old 06.04.2013, 23:53
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Re: My cat and the neighbor

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Have some backbone and tell her outright to stop feeding your cat, because it is just encouraging it to go to her house. Who cares if her husband is the police, she is just being a nosey pest and you can't let her dictate how you live your life, especially if it is causing you genuine stress.
I went and it is not possible. Her husband is not the police, she and him are, and I was told to not cross them by other nieghbors... What is that?
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Old 06.04.2013, 23:58
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Re: My cat and the neighbor

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Or you could ask them not to feed your cat, as you don't want him to become fat as them.
OK, how do you do that? I told her. Answer: "Your cat is in a bad state, you don't feed him, you don't take care of him, bla blabla

I asked her to not concern herself with my cat and to let me be. I also reminded her to look around and pick on another cat if she really wants to enjoy herself.
It was an impossible communication. Her answer: "I am not the only one, and I will call the Tierschutz, bla bla"

And she has a cat, a fat one.
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Old 06.04.2013, 23:59
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Re: My cat and the neighbor

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simple.. tell her the cat is on a special diet because someone has been feeding it and they are giving the cat normal food and the vet says it could kill the cat.

and If she continues to feed the cat then she will be liable for the vet fees.
That is a good one, I did tell her that I would take him to the vet because he is very fat since we came here. Of course, she pointed at her cat, dah, he is bigger than mine... if possible!
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Old 07.04.2013, 00:05
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Re: My cat and the neighbor

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ignore,ignore ,ignore.

these people will destroy your life when it comes to it.
Usually all they need is one freakout from you. She has not one leg to stand on. Tell her to leave you alone or you will put in formal complaints against her and her husband . Police will want to tend that of their record. Just enjoy your living space and let her be. you can even go as far of accusing her to poison your cat....just to be back in her face. Just be smart about it and play her game for a while until she finds something else to do.
Can I go to another police than the one in my village? If I go here, I will be talking to her and her husband... and their friends. Difficult.

I had a friend of mine (Swiss) go over there and tell her to back off or else. I have no idea what this will bring. She is like "fine, but next time the cat if out and "suffering" I'll call the Tierschutz"

Has anyone had experience with them?

Just I am worried. My sister had her dog taken awy while she was at work, the neighbor reported her because the dog had a mouth that looked rotten. When my sister came back from work, she had to locate her dog. She explained that the dog had mouth cancer and was being treated. She was told she could not see her dog, had to come back teh next day, and the next day she was handed a plastic bag with her dead dog inside.
So, my experience with them acting upon complaints is not good (but this was not in Switzerland).

My Swiss friends told me to not call Tierschutz to come. I wanted them to see my cat is fine. They said that it will make things worse.

Anyone went through this?
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Old 07.04.2013, 00:21
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Re: My cat and the neighbor

Just let her know if she calls anyone you will get in touch with a lawyer in regards to harassment. If she wastes time of an official she can be held liable. The fact that she is the wife of a police man does not help.
I think you can go to the federal police but must pass the village police first. Does the husband bother you?
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Old 07.04.2013, 01:02
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Re: My cat and the neighbor

How about complaining to the landlord? People have complained to the landlord here for me playing my stereo loud while I was away on a monthlong vacation in Thailand (I guess I have discovered the secret formula to Teletransportation or something?), which got me a nice, very formal-looking warning letter. If people can complain about lies like that, surely you can complain about this woman harassing your cat?
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Old 07.04.2013, 01:24
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Re: My cat and the neighbor

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Now, 6 months down the line, she feeds my cat, because I obviously don't feed him (if I did he would not eat her food).
I'm sorry you are being terrorized by a busy-body who is definitely not busy enough and should get a hobby.

I quoted the above sentence because I need to get it out of my chest...people who think this and say this out loud are plain STUPID and have never had cats and are as judgmental as I am sounding with this sentence . My red tabbies would eat anytime, anywhere no matter the portions and were ALWAYS looking for more and sometimes people would say oh it's because you don't fed them properly...SHUT UP really... Now I have Siamese kittens, they also eat like lions but do not gain much weight. I showed someone a picture of Audrey (who weighs 5 kilos) and he said oh she is skinny...I said you need to get glasses dude, she is 5 kilos and a Siamese. Thais do not get as fat as other cats do...Why are some people so judgmental, always giving their opinions when not asked for them? *sigh* About your dilemma, can you get a net around your balcony so that kitty does not leave? a cat flap? Tell neighbor to mind her own business or you'l complain...Maybe they are the police of the small town but there is always kantonal police...good luck!!
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Old 07.04.2013, 01:43
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Re: My cat and the neighbor

The law is actually on your side, you just have to get over the fact that your cat is considered as a thing and your property, which is odd, but it doesn't change the following:
- your cat may have special dietary needs, by feeding your cat just any food, your neighbour may be damaging your cat (aka property) and cause high vet bills due to improper feeding. A fat cat is NOT a happy cat. If you cannot feel the ribs of a cat, it is too fat, or so my veterinary nurse sister keeps telling me. Cats are meant to be slender, agile creatures, not Garfield.
- by feeding your cat, your neighbour is making the cat stay with her more and more frequently, so it could be argued that she is in fact trying to draw your cat away from you, effectively stealing him (aka your property). It is recommended to talk this out, if this fails to help and if your cat basically chooses to live with her, you could take civil action against her as she is impinging on your rights as the owner of property (aka the cat).

So while there is no legal provision against feeding someone else's cat, there are provisions against damaging property or taking away your rights to property, an animal is "eine bewegliche Sache", which falls under property.

I may have missed this in all the details but do you have a cat door? If it was cold and I saw a kitty sat in front of its house, I have to admit I may take him in too, I wouldn't give him food of course and bring him back as soon as I saw you were back but I don't think this is what is up with your neighbour. Rain is definitely not an issue with cats and my cats even play in the snow, but being locked out in the cold is no fun - you could make him a comfy box to wait in if you have no cat door, that way Mrs. Nosy doesn't see that he is out.

But definitely don't give him away, he doesn't deserve that.
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Old 07.04.2013, 10:20
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Re: My cat and the neighbor

When was the last time you took your cat for a checkup at the vet ?

I know a friend of ours, who is a vet, hates seeing fat cats - she says it has a huge effect on their lifespan (die sooner) and quality of life (hurts their body, they can't get out and do 'cat' things)...

When you say, the neighbour and her husband are the police, do you mean they actually work at the police station ? In that case, she will well-know she is throwing her weight around and using her position wrongly. And don't assume that her husband approves of her behaviour...

Maybe you could phone the Tierschutz and get their advice ? Check if you are doing the 'right' thing - check the rules with them - then you have nothing to fear. Ask the vet what he suggests...are you doing the 'right' thing.

Bullies work on fear. And as mentioned, get a cat door, if you think your cat needs freedom. Some cats are never let outdoors at all...


Your story about the dog with mouth cancer bothers me. If I read correctly, your sister's dog was extremely ill, and your sister didn't know, and the dog was reported by someone who knew the dog was sick, and the dog was taken away and put down because it was in pain ? And you think somehow that's not ok ? - point is, maybe there are some things you need to learn about cats, and what is acceptable, and if you do put the cat outside, then it should also be able to come in whenever it wants to....and if you want to keep it indoors all day, then you need to recognise that it's needs may also not be met - again, ask the vet if it's acceptable to be doing that.

You are also incorrect that cats sleep 20-22 hours a day. 15-20 is a more reasonable number. Fat, sick, very young and very old cats, will sleep more towards the 20 hours end of the spectrum. They are naturally more active in the morning and evening, so yes, it's probably fine for them to be indoors during the day, and some cats are always indoor cats...

My point is not to say 'you are wrong' - my point is, before you get into the battle again, get your facts completely straight, talk to your vet, talk to the Tierschutz, and check that you are following their guidelines, then get someone who writes German nicely to write a letter to your neighbour, informing them that you have taken advice from the Tierschutz and the Vet, and both have said XYZ, and that you are politely asking her to desist from feeding your cat, encouraging your cat to stay in her home, or bullying you with her behaviour.
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Old 07.04.2013, 11:25
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Re: My cat and the neighbor

Please get in touch with either these people:

TierImRecht

or ask the "Tierschutzbeauftragte" of your local animal shelter.
They can then get in touch with your neighbor and explain the matter as well as the legal consequences. People feeding animals of others is a big problem and they shouldn't get away easy with such behaviour.
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Old 07.04.2013, 11:45
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Re: My cat and the neighbor

I really don't understand the original post here. The OP has had problems because of their cat in three different places, and it isn't really clear why and the dog story is incredibly distressing as well. (Waiting until a neighbor notices a dog has late stage mouth cancer? WHAT?)

I don't think it's particularly prudent, when one doesn't know the full story, to offer advice like "call them fat", writing notes to f-off, lying and saying they're trying to poison the cat, especially if they're the police.

Maybe the right thing to do is to get the Tierschutz involved and if she's doing everything right, she'll presumably have them on their side in any future conflicts..

And if you don't want people feeding your cat maybe keeping your cat confined to your property is a good idea.
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Old 07.04.2013, 23:43
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Re: My cat and the neighbor

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Just let her know if she calls anyone you will get in touch with a lawyer in regards to harassment. If she wastes time of an official she can be held liable. The fact that she is the wife of a police man does not help.
I think you can go to the federal police but must pass the village police first. Does the husband bother you?
It is actually that they both are police people. No idea which rank. The man is apparently quiet, according to other people who had to deal with her. She is nasty. I will go to the police in the next village, and see what I can do.
Thank you
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Old 07.04.2013, 23:46
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Re: My cat and the neighbor

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How about complaining to the landlord? People have complained to the landlord here for me playing my stereo loud while I was away on a monthlong vacation in Thailand (I guess I have discovered the secret formula to Teletransportation or something?), which got me a nice, very formal-looking warning letter. If people can complain about lies like that, surely you can complain about this woman harassing your cat?
I called the agency. They do not care. They told me that they accept cats as long as there is no issues with neighbors. If "I /my cat create/s" problems with the neighbors, it is not their problem.
Wow, yes, amazing that you can be away and playng your stereo... People here have so much time on their hands!!
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Old 07.04.2013, 23:52
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Re: My cat and the neighbor

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My red tabbies would eat anytime, anywhere no matter the portions and were ALWAYS looking for more and sometimes people would say oh it's because you don't fed them properly...SHUT UP really... Thais do not get as fat as other cats do...Why are some people so judgmental, always giving their opinions when not asked for them? *sigh* About your dilemma, can you get a net around your balcony so that kitty does not leave? a cat flap? Tell neighbor to mind her own business or you'l complain...Maybe they are the police of the small town but there is always kantonal police...good luck!!
I agree with that, and thank you for your support. My cat eats at home, probably hunts mice and birds, and yes, if she hands him a plate of food, he will eat again and again... My balcony looks onto her house, and when my cat was there (last summer) she voiced her first complaint and "told" me to let him out. pff! so nosy!

I have a catflap, but it was placed on a window, and people around here joke and say you can open the window through the catflap and enter the house. So I blocked it. I am thinking of putting one on the front door, am nothing of a carpenter though... I will think
Thank you so much!
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